Evie Kirshner is an 18 year old gap year student studying in Israel on Kivunim. She graduated from the Heschel school and will be attending Emory university in the fall. Evie has ADHD and anxiety. In her spare time, she loves photography, watching movies, and reading. Today we learn why she was diagnosed early in her life, about some of the choices and decisions she’s made thus far, how they’re working out and her advice to you. Enjoy! 

In this episode Peter and Evie Kirshner discuss:  

00:40 - Thank you so much for listening and for subscribing!

01:05 - The Boy With the Faster Brain comes out in about a month!!

01:40 - Intro and welcome Evie Kirshner

01:50 - How’s the weather in Israel today?  Ref: The Kivunim Institute 

02:34 - So you were diagnosed in 1st grade. Tell us your story?

03:28 - Kind of how things go in first grade with ADHD or ADD

04:23 - What were some of your symptoms? Did you get in trouble much?

04:40 - Were you put on meds? Did they work?

05:20 - To sparkle or not to sparkle…

06:20 - You can't live the rest of your life just talking out of turn; or can you!? What happened?

07:02 - On resolution and resolve

07:54 - Is there anything you think you may need to change? Or for in the future?

09:05 - What was your parents’ reaction upon your diagnosis? 

10:00 - What would you tell a kid who's seven years old and getting diagnosed today?

10:20 - How can people find more about you? 

Socials: @EVKirshner on INSTA and Snapchat

11:28 - Faster Than Normal Podcast info & credits.Guys, as always thanks so much for subscribing! Faster Than Normal is for YOU! We want to know what you’d like to hear! Do you have a cool friend with a great story? We’d love to learn about, and from them. I'm www.petershankman.com and you can reach out anytime via email at peter@shankman.com or @petershankman on all of the socials. You can also find us at @FasterNormal on all of the socials. It really helps when you drop us a review on iTunes and of course, subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t already! As you know, the more reviews we get, the more people we can reach. Help us to show the world that ADHD is a gift, not a curse! 

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TRANSCRIPT via Descript and then corrected.. somewhat:

[00:00:42] Peter: Hi everyone. Welcome to Faster Than Normal. My name is Peter Shankman. It is great to have you for another episode. If you are binging this welcome back. Uh, someone emailed me today and they go, Hey, I found your podcast last week. I'm like, really? Which one? How many episodes do they go? All of them. I'm like, Just doing some quick math in my head. That's a lot of time, but either way, I am thrilled that you're here. It's great to have you guys. And if you haven't already heard, uh, the Children's book is launching in about a month. It is called The Boy With the Faster Brain. So I am super, super excited about that. We have a fun guest today. We're going to Israel. We are going to the Promised Land today to talk to Evie Kirschner, who's an 18 year old gap year student. She's studying in Israel on Kivunim, and she'll explain what that is. She graduated from the Herschel School. She'll be attending Emory University in the fall. She has ADD and anxiety, and she got diagnosed when she was in first grade, so around seven years old. I love talking to kids who are like 18 years old. They're like, yeah, I got diagnosed in first grade. I'm like, Mike Ben, when I was in first grade. They didn't even know what ADHD was. Welcome to the show. It's good to have you. 

[00:01:40] Evie: Thank you. 

[00:01:41] Peter: Well it's snowing here in New York. How's the weather in Israel?

[00:01:44] Evie: Oh, it's, it's actually pouring rain. I just got caught in the rain actually. It's not pretty out.

[00:01:49] Peter: Okay. And I don't feel so bad. good. Alright. Well, welcome to the podcast. Glad to have you. So I discovered you because I have lots of friends who send me articles and stuff all the time and say, oh, this person is adhd, you's interviewing them, and, and you caught my eye cause you wrote a beautiful article and you so, so first of all, tell us what you're doing in Israel. 

[00:02:07] Evie: This year I'm studying and traveling on a program called Kivunim. So five months out of the year we're studying, like basically taking college classes, you know, five days a week. And then for three months out of the eight we are traveling around the world. I'm going to 13 different countries and studying contemporary culture and ancient history and Jewish history and communities that existed in all those countries. So it's like, it's really cool stuff. It's, it's pretty awesome. 

[00:02:34] Peter: That's very, very cool. So let's talk about ADHD so you were diagnosed in first grade. What was that like? What was what? How did it come about? What the teachers say? Tell me your story. 

[00:02:43] Evie: I thought it was cancer. . I, I was so em embarrassed. I was fir when I was told I was devastated and I wouldn't tell anybody. It was like my deepest orca secret. I thought it was the only person in the world with adhd. My parents like sat me down and told me. I mean, they were running tests on my brain at NYU by the time I was eight. Really? Yes. I had a severe case especially, and this was in 19? This was in 2000, 2011. 12. Okay. I was always told I had the energy of a boy inside a girl and they had never seen anything like it, and that made me feel. I was like, oh no, I'm, I'm secretly like, have the energy of a boy, and this is like, I can't tell anyone. I have this like, big, heavy secret weighing on me. 

[00:03:28] Peter: Yeah. And that's in first grade. In first grade, that's kinda hard to handle. 

[00:03:31] Evie: Oh, it was really hard to handle. I was devastated and I, I, I really felt it all the time. Like I had something that made me different that I couldn't tell people about. Um, and I think, like as I got older, you know, people always say to me, well, everyone's a little ADD everyone's a little ADHD , and I'm like, well, hmm, hmm. . Um, I think like when you're, you know, doing, you're getting up in first grade and spinning circles around your desk while everyone's sitting and writing, I think like there's a difference. You know, there's the, there's dozing off and then there's like, actually there's not being able to function in a classroom at seven years old. 

[00:04:09] Peter: Yep. So what was, is that, was that some of the symptoms you were just a little, little hyper, a little. 

[00:04:14] Evie: I was hyper, I was crazy. I was, time and place did not occur to me. I kind of marched to the beat of my own drum. 

[00:04:23] Peter: Okay. That's funny. It's exactly what my mother used to tell me all the time. did it. Uh, did it get you in trouble at all? . 

[00:04:29] Evie: Oh, all the time. I was in the principal's office, like I'd say until high school, almost every day of, of middle school, at least. I think like in lower school, they were more lenient on me. Yeah. But I was in the, yeah, I was in the principals a lot. 

[00:04:43] Peter: So you were diagnosed in first grade, but were you put on meds? What happened?

[00:04:47] Evie: I was put on meds in third grade actually. Um, and I stayed on the same meds almost every day until my junior year of high school. Okay. 

[00:04:57] Peter: And were they, do you, did you feel like they were, did you feel like, did you feel like they were working?

[00:05:01] Evie: Oh, they were totally working, but they dulled my sparkle. Yeah. So I decided it was, it was time to let it go. 

[00:05:11] Peter: I understand that. And so, so when you say dulled your sparkle, why .Did it make you, obviously it made you more focused, but it, did it take away that ooph or did it take away that creativity?

[00:05:20] Evie: It took, it took away the oomph. It took away a lot of, it just kind of suppressed everything. It's almost as if, the way I describe it to people, like it's if you turn the saturation down, I'm like the way you, the way you see everything. 

[00:05:32] Peter: So you decided to get off of it in seventh grade. 

[00:05:35] Evie: Um, in junior year of high school I started oh, junior 

[00:05:37] Peter: high school. Okay. Okay. But you said you were in the principal's office a lot in high school? No, in middle school. In middle s. Okay. I'm confused. So you were on the meds and still gonna the principal's office. Oh yes. Interesting. Okay. And what were, what were your charges? What were you, what were you usually busted for?

[00:05:53] Evie: Um, making an inappropriate song in the middle of class. , um, texting, um, chatting with a friend over here, not being able to control what came outta my mouth, things like that. Examples like, 

[00:06:09] Peter: All right, so obviously there are a ton of people listening right now who hear themselves in your story, , I mean, including me. Um, so what did you do, right? It's obviously you can't live the rest of your life just talking at a turn. I mean, maybe you can. So what happened?

[00:06:26] Evie: I think it actually wasn't necessarily anything that changed in me, but something that changed in the people around me in that I think they realized I was a well-intentioned kid. Smart. I had a good head on my shoulders and I meant, I meant well. Um, I was loving and deep down I was really respectful. I just didn't always show respect and often displayed disrespect. But, um, it had nothing to do with how I felt about my teachers or my peers and more to do with something that I was struggling with internally.

[00:07:00] Peter: Interesting. So, am I getting sort of the feeling that you just, for lack of a better word, just decided I'm gonna live my life. 

[00:07:09] Evie: Yeah, I did. I think like, I mean, I'm still at the point where I'm, you know, deciding, okay, I don't have to change this. I don't have to be self-conscious about this anymore. People around me are gonna have to learn to accept this, and I don't have to be the one that stops kicking the desk or stops, you know, biting my fingernails or dozing off or seeming like I'm not paying attention when someone's speaking because if they know me well enough, they'll know that I am. . And I think like I'm, I think I'm still getting to that point in many ways and I'll see other ways in which that manifests itself over time. But I think I have like chucked a lot of it in the efit bucket like I think that, um, there were many things, especially the way it manifests itself in the classroom, that I just said to myself, okay, so this might be something that I have to explain to teachers, not change, 

[00:07:54] Peter: Is there anything that you think may have to change? I mean, I, I am all in the category of, hey, here's who I am, deal with it. But I also know that there are times, right. Especially in my quote unquote adult life, um, where I have to, okay, you're, you're going to listen to this visiting professor. You probably shouldn't make a joke in the middle class, or things like that. Mm-hmm. . So are there any points that you've seen that yet?

[00:08:17] Evie: Yes. So I think now that I'm kind of in a more of a college setting, um, I find that, and even in high school, I find that when it, when it gets hard and I feel impulses coming on, or it's hard for me to sit still in class, I just, I just leave and come back. Okay. Or I'll do, I'll do something else. I can't be sitting still with thoughts and impulses and wanting to speak, and I'll either be doodling or tapping my foot or bit like, uh, or, or I'll just leave the room. 

[00:08:49] Peter: Interesting. Interesting. So you are, you've basically accepted what you have. You don't take meds for it and you're sort of pulling a a, a Greatest Showman. This is me. 

[00:09:02] Evie: Yes. This is me. . 

[00:09:04] Peter: Awesome. Okay. What did your, um, parents, uh, how were they when you first got diagnosed? What was their, what was their, uh, reaction?

[00:09:13] Evie: They, well, I, they took it very seriously, which is I think why I thought it was such a huge deal. They were like, you have ADHD , we're gonna take you to a therapist, get you meds. And I was like, oh shit. I'm like, dying of something as hard . I was, I was really, I was really scared. Um, but my parents took it very seriously. I, lucky enough, I have a mom who works in the world of learning disabilities um, and she very much like got me the help I needed academically early on. You know, taught me that it's a, it's a gift, not a curse. And, um, even though I felt for a lot of my childhood, like it was, and I think I, I had parents who always reminded me that I'm gonna realize one day that my, I actually really do love the way my brain works. 

[00:09:59] Peter: Awesome. I love that. So what would you tell a kid who's, uh, seven years old getting diagnosed? 

[00:10:05] Evie: That their brain is beautiful. Mm-hmm. .And it might take time to realize. And other people are gonna see it first. And other people are gonna tell you it's not there, but you'll see it over time. 

[00:10:17] Peter: Very, very cool. Very, very cool. Tell us how people can find you. Are you on any of the socials? 

[00:10:23] Evie: I am, I'm on social media. I am on Instagram and Snapchat. I don't really have any other, 

[00:10:30] Peter: what's your username on Instagram? I. 

Evie Kirshner, the letters E & V K I R S H N E R. 

Okay. Very cool. Well, okay. Thank you so much for taking the time. I appreciate it. 

[00:10:42] Evie: Thank you.

I'm gonna have you back, I'm gonna have you back next year and see how, uh, Emory's treating you. I have a lot of friends who went there.

Oh, really? Okay. Well that'd be awesome. I'm looking forward to it.

[00:10:50] Peter: Very cool. Guys, you've been listening to Peter Shankman and this is, that was Evie Kirshner talking about Faster Than Normal and talking about how she grew up A D H D and when she finally decided to say screw it, and live her life and sounds to me like she's doing just fine.

We'll be back next week with another episode. As always, wanna hear what you think, you can leave us, review anywhere, you can tell us what's going on. Wanna thank Steven Byrom, who's our editor and producer, who constantly shakes his head when in the middle of an episode I go, oh, by the way, Steven, do this. So we love you, Steven, [Your Producer/editor loves you too, is proud of the work this podcast is doing and hopes that these transcripts are helpful] and uh, we will see you guys next week with another episode of Faster Than Normal, and hopefully by then I'll have some info on when the book will be out. So stay tuned. Thanks for listening. We'll talk to you soon!  

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Credits: You've been listening to the Faster Than Normal podcast. We're available on iTunes, Stitcher and Google play and of course at www.FasterThanNormal.com I'm your host, Peter Shankman and you can find me at shankman.com and @petershankman on all of the socials. If you like what you've heard, why not head over to your favorite podcast platform of choice and leave us a review, come more people who leave positive reviews, the more the podcast has shown, and the more people we can help understand that ADHD is a gift, not a curse. Opening and closing themes were composed and produced by Steven Byrom who also produces this podcast, and the opening introduction was recorded by Bernie Wagenblast. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next week! 

Nik's Social Media Channel ADHDVision is a global movement aimed at improving well-being, productivity and overall life quality for people with attention deficit disorder (ADHD). With over 150 Million views in just under 2 years Nik has rapidly created a community of over 1.8 million people who follow him and are inspired by his work to live their BEST life with their brain. He is currently running an international inner circle of ADHD business owners and is on a mission to make the knowledge around creating and thriving as a business owner with ADHD more accessible. Enjoy! 

In this episode Peter and Nik Hobrecker discuss:  

00:40 - Thank you so much for listening and for subscribing!

00:47 - Intro and welcome Nik Hobrecker!

01:47 - Tell us your story; when were you diagnosed?

02:41 - It all was kind of like an ‘explainer bomb’

03:30 - You live in an especially beautiful part of Thailand. How do you stay productive? Ref: Faster Than Normal book

05:00 - On rejection sensitivity and living in a ‘vacation destination’.

06:30 - What have you been learning from your new Mastermind group; how best to lead?

07:30 - Ref: Perfectionism, decision paralysis, imposter syndrome

08:14 - How many people do you have in your group?

08:45 - What are some of the things you’ve learned by running this group?

09:49 - What would you tell an entrepreneur who's just been diagnosed; next steps, etc?

14:40 - How can people find more about you? 

Socials: @ADHDVision:  YouTube  INSTA  TikTok  Twitter

This was great- thank you Nik!

11:37 - Drumroll please:  I have a new book coming out mid-February! The title is….

12:21 - Faster Than Normal Podcast info & credits.

Guys, as always thanks so much for subscribing! Faster Than Normal is for YOU! We want to know what you’d like to hear! Do you have a cool friend with a great story? We’d love to learn about, and from them. I'm www.petershankman.com and you can reach out anytime via email at peter@shankman.com or @petershankman on all of the socials. You can also find us at @FasterNormal on all of the socials. It really helps when you drop us a review on iTunes and of course, subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t already! As you know, the more reviews we get, the more people we can reach. Help us to show the world that ADHD is a gift, not a curse! 

—

TRANSCRIPT via Descript and then corrected.. somewhat:

[00:00:39] Peter: Hello everyone. Good morning and welcome to another episode of Faster Than Normal. My name is Peter Shankman. I wanna say how many words I could say all in one breath. Good to have you guys. It is a pleasure to see you all again. Talk to you all again. It is wonderful to be back, pretty much back weekly. Now we have a bunch of episodes in the can, so things are good. Let's take a trip today.

Let's take a trip. All the way over to Asia, into Thailand, where we're gonna meet up with Nick Hobrecker. Nick has a really cool backstory and I'll let him tell you, but all what all you need to know is he runs a social media channel called A D H D Vision with over 150 million views. Atta aimed at improving wellbeing, productivity, overall life quality for people with A D H D. Sounds like someone you know. He's created a community of over 1.8 million people who follow him and are inspired by his work to live their best life with their brain. He's running an international circle of ADHD business owners again. Sounds like someone you know. Nick, welcome to the podcast. Good to have you, 

[00:01:35] Nik: Peter. Lovely to be here. Thank you for having me, my friend. 

[00:01:38] Peter: It's great to, great to have you. It's great to find someone on the other side of the world doing the same thing. Tell us your story. How are you diagnosed? How'd you figure it out? Um, how old are you? What's, what's the, what's everything? . 

[00:01:48] Nik: Yeah man. So first of all, I'm from Germany, so, um, the whole notion of ADHD, uh, is still arriving there as we speak. Um, I got diagnosed in college, so quite late. I was about 21. If my memory serves me correctly, probably won't, but about 21. And, um, I was studying entrepreneurship in college. It was my fourth, fifth semester and, you know, classical story, mind blown. My whole life has explained itself to me all in a flash. And that's when I started creating content. I was active on YouTube way before then, you know, I was making funny videos on some random games. You know, Roone Scape League of Legends was always a passion of mine. And then I found a way to channel that passion into something helpful for people, which, um, you know, has now gained me that, uh, the amount of followers and, and the views that, that you just mentioned. I'm very grateful for it. I'm really, really happy to be able to reach the people that I do. And, um, Yeah. It's just, you know, showing people what my journey has been and trying my best to, to educate, uh, them so they don't have to say, have the same mistakes and go through the same struggles that I did.

[00:02:51] Peter: Yeah, it is, it is a wake up call when you figure out exactly what's going on and how you can use that to your advantage, isn't it? 

[00:03:00] Nik: It is, it's, it's huge. Um, you know, I keep going back to the same thing, saying the same thing, but it always, for me it's just, it's like an explainer bomb, right? All of a sudden, you know Exactly, um, who you are, why you do the things you do, and why you've been different your whole life. And, um, yeah, wanted to give that, that knowledge and that awareness to more people, because for me, it was a game changer. Ever since then, my, my life completely turned. 

[00:03:27] Peter: Tell me about, uh, an average day for you. Cause right now you're in, you're in Poquette, Thailand, which is one of the most beautiful places in the world. It's, it's a favorite place of mine. I've been there many, many times and I don't necessarily know how productive I'd be living in a place like Phuket Thailand. So tell us what you're doing to, to sort of stay productive and how are, how are you surviving that? 

[00:03:46] Nik: Man, let me, let me tell you, it's . It's a constant struggle, but, uh, there are a few routines in place, um, you know, occasional fun routines that I use to, to, uh, to stay on top of everything. So I do also wanna mention Peter, I, you know, your book Faster Than Normal helped me, um, a lot when I got diagnosed and it was actually part of my inspiration to go out and use my brain for, um, for its benefits. And, uh, what you mentioned in your book, uh, has stayed true, you know, pretty much ever since I've read it, which is just exercising, right, um, exercising in the morning, not just doing something for the dopamine for that reward chemical at the end, but doing something because you enjoy it. I really enjoy running. , right. Um, so every morning I try to do my run. I, I try to do my, my ab exercises. Um, I've got a gym just around the corner. Accessibility is everything, right? If the gym is around the corner, the motivation hurdle is a lot less steep. So that helps me. And other than that, you know what? Thailand is beautiful and the nature just also gives you that energy, right? There's been different studies, I think, on A D H D and nature and how can I help you focus. We've got a beautiful garden, outback, um, and you know, sometimes it's just great to to, to tank up the creativity that, that I need for from my videos.

[00:04:59] Peter: That's awesome. So it's, I mean, it's a beautiful, there's no question it's a beautiful location. Um, how is it working there in an environment that, that doesn't necessarily lend itself to work, per se? I mean, tell us what you're doing. Like, you know, what do you do to get sort of like a dopamine hit in the middle of the day. Are you gonna go out and run on the beach or are you gonna go for a swim or, you know, tell me about that. 

[00:05:18] Nik: What I like to do is just do something different to what I usually do. So it's just novelty. Novelty for me, gives me that dopamine kick, gives me that creative spark that I need to create new and and meaningful content. So, uh, for me it's just all about exploring this, this beautiful place. You know, we've, we've done so many different trips. I'm here with two of my very good high school friends who are also, you know, we like to call ourselves digital nomads, right? So we travel the world don't really have one specific place that we stay. And we just like to explore this, this beautiful island. I mean, you yourself, I think you've been here, Peter, right? It's, it's beautiful. You have um, this amazing culture shock of just, by the way, people are amazingly nice here. Yeah. Which is very nice for rejection sensitivity, cuz you never get rejected. Everybody's so nice to you, you know? Yeah. Um, on the one hand, on the other hand, you've got these, these beautiful beaches, these um, these amazing, I mean, we went to this huge statue of like a big Buddha. Um, it was a bit of a steep climb, but we went up there and inside this Buddha, they were actually meditating. Meditation has been a huge remedy for me and my A D H D right? Mindfulness. Um, and even though it's a struggle, um, sitting there in a big Buddha meditating with monks, I never knew I had a bucket list until that. You know what I mean? So that was, that was crazy. 

[00:06:33] Peter: That's very cool. Tell me about, um, let's, let's flip gears a little bit to the business side of things. Tell me about what you're doing in terms of, so you run a mastermind or, or a, a group. Yeah. Um, all focused, adhd. Are people coming to you with, are you finding that people coming to you from an ADHD standpoint with all the same problems? Um, you know, the lack of focus, the ability is everything different? 

[00:06:52] Nik: I mean, look, this mastermind that I'm now creating, right? We are in the very early stages. You know, it's, um, there's a lot of things that we still need to get right, but um, it's an experiment and we're testing things out, um, to see what's gonna give everybody the most value in the long term. Um, and what I've found, and the reason for creating this mastermind for ADHD Entrepreneurs in the first place is, you know, A D H D is often put on a pedestal when it comes to entrepreneurship, which it should be. We are great entrepreneurs, right? Five times more likely to start a business, et cetera. But, um, you know, we really talk about the struggles that do come with owning a business and having a D H D, right? Perfectionism, uh, decision paralysis, imposter syndrome. , all these different things that, that mass up into this, uh, big, you know, ball of, well, what the hell do I do now? Right? And that's where the inception of the group came from to have a support system. Right? One family that supports one another that gets one another, right? I think as business owners, Peter, you're probably gonna relate to this, is just as ADHD business owners, we often don't feel like the other people get it. You. 95% of people usually don't. And having a circle of like-minded people who get each other, um, and who can network with each other all at the same time, um, so far has been proving incredibly valuable. 

[00:08:14] Peter: Awesome. Uh, how many people do you have in the group?

[00:08:16] Nik: Right now? We've got 13. I wanna keep it really small because this is, you know, we're starting out. It's, it's an experiment. I wanna get everybody's feedback. I wanna make this the most kick ass group. Um, there, there is. And, um, you know, to do that, uh, we gotta dig down in the trenches and I wanna, you know, I've got feedback calls lined up with everybody. Um, and it's more like that we're creating this group together rather than just me, you know, spearheading it.

[00:08:38] Peter: Yep. That's awesome. That's awesome. What, what have you learned, um, about yourself from running a group like that? Because, I mean, I know that when I ran, when I run mine, one of the things I learned consistently, consistently, consistently over and over again is that I'm, that any problem I think I can have, right? Any problem I think that I, I'm probably the only person in the world that has this, there's no one else with, is not everyone has the same issues. Um, we just don't talk about 'em a lot. Right. So when you get into a group and you start doing that, it changes everything. So what are some of the things that you've learned?

[00:09:04] Nik: I mean, yeah, it's just, it's just exactly what you said. So I'm, I'm very fortunate to be in the position of being, um, you know, a bystander to listen to these amazing, vulnerable stories that do get shared. Um, and, you know, these are all very successful business owners that we have in this group. And you know what a lot of them talk about is, you know, problems like not really being understood, right. Wanting to people please everybody, even though it's your business. And, you know, certain things like that where you just, you. And you're like, damn, that's been, that's exactly been my experience. I just haven't been able to verbalize it. And just hearing that from people feeling at home is, I mean, I don't think there's any, um, any higher value than, than that. 

[00:09:48] Peter: Yeah, no question about it. What would you tell an entrepreneur who's just gotten diagnosed and who has all these questions and, and, and really doesn't know what the next step is? 

[00:09:58] Nik: Well, um, it's a great question. I don't think I can answer that in like one or two sentences, but the first thing that I would wanna tell them is that you've got a unique set of strengths that work for you, and you should use those strengths, get better at those strengths, right? Build your strengths, but. Try to outsource your weaknesses rather than like, try your best and like force yourself like, oh, I really have to do these financial, uh, statements right now. Like, no, get a virtual assistant for that. Right? You know, like there are certain things that your brain is just not meant to be doing. If you are an entrepreneur, of course, if you don't have the money, you're gonna have to stick through it. But, you know, virtual assistants are quite affordable nowadays, especially online. I know. Oh, totally. Um, I'm sure Peter, I don't know if, if you have, uh, I mean, how many virtual assistants do you have? Do you have one , two?

[00:10:44] Peter: I've, I've been fortunate. I've had the same assistant going on 15 years now. And she was originally, she originally started with me and then she moved, uh, went and got married. Uh, so she lives in Massachusetts now, but still works for me. Wow. 

[00:10:54] Nik: Well, fif 15 years. That is, um, that is awesome. 

[00:10:56] Peter: She saved my life. She saves my life on a, on a regular basis. 

[00:10:59] Nik: Yeah. Yeah, I hear that. I hear that. I've got one now. You know, we've been together, been together. Sounds, sounds odd, but you know, it's been 3, 4, 5 months. Um, and, um, yeah, she's, she's also been a lifesaver. So, I mean, but to get back to your question, that's what I would say. Focus on your strengths, outsource your weaknesses. 

[00:11:14] Peter: Awesome. I love it. Guys, thank you so much for listening. I really, Nick, thank you so much for taking the time. How can people find you? 

[00:11:21] Nik: Um, just at ADHDVision on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, you'll find me. Um, I'll be very happy to, uh, share some content with you.

[00:11:31] Peter: I love it guys. Check Nik out. And as always, if you like what you hear, leave us a note. And I told you some good news last week. I'm gonna repeat it again this week. There is a children's book coming out and I can share the name with you now. It is called The Boy with the Faster Brain. And it is, you know, the first question I get every time I say that first question is, oh, is it autobiography? Well, yeah, kind of. But I think you're gonna like it. I think you're gonna enjoy reading it, and it should be coming out mid-February, so I will have a lot more info on that soon. It is gonna be for your kids, anywhere from ages 8 to. 14. It's gonna be a lot of fun, so stay tuned for that. As always, thank you for listening. Thanks to our guest. If you know a guest you think should be on as cool as Nik, shoot us a note, peter@shankman.com or at Peter Shankman, all the socials or @ FasterNormal . We will see you guys next week. As always, thank you for listening. Stay strong. Bye. We'll see you next week.
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Credits: You've been listening to the Faster Than Normal podcast. We're available on iTunes, Stitcher and Google play and of course at www.FasterThanNormal.com I'm your host, Peter Shankman and you can find me at shankman.com and @petershankman on all of the socials. If you like what you've heard, why not head over to your favorite podcast platform of choice and leave us a review, come more people who leave positive reviews, the more the podcast has shown, and the more people we can help understand that ADHD is a gift, not a curse. Opening and closing themes were composed and produced by Steven Byrom who also produces this podcast, and the opening introduction was recorded by Bernie Wagenblast. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next week! 

Abbie McCarthy is an award-winning TV / Radio presenter & DJ, you’ll find her hosting BBC Music Introducing in Kent on the airwaves every Saturday night and also bringing great new music & fun interviews to your TV screens on 4Music and E4 Extra with Fresh This Month. Abbie is known for bringing the party with her DJ sets and this year has played at a whole host of festivals, including Glastonbury, Latitude & Knebworth, as well as playing several arena shows. Abbie is also the host and curator of popular gig night Good Karma Club, which has put on early shows for the likes of Tom Grennan, Mae Muller, Easy Life & many more and has even featured some famous faces in the crowds over the years - Alex Turner, Lewis Capaldi & Wolf Alice. Abbie’s huge contribution to both the radio & music industry was celebrated when she was inducted into the Roll of Honour at Music Week’s Women In Music Awards 2018. Abbie has been highlighted by the Radio Academy as one of the brightest young stars in radio, recently featuring in their esteemed 30 under 30 list and winning Silver for Best Music Presenter at the ARIAs 2020. Aside from music, Abbie’s other passion is sport, which really shines through in her entertaining coverage on Matchday Live for Chelsea TV. You’ll also find Abbie guesting frequently on BBC Two’s football show, MOTDx and doing online coverage for England and the Lionesses football teams. How has she been so successful already, especially having just recently been diagnosed, and what advice does she impart to us? Enjoy! 

In this episode Peter and Abbie McCarthy discuss:  

00:40 - Thank you so much for listening and for subscribing!

00:47 - Intro and welcome Abbie ‘AbbieAbbieMac’ McCarthy!

03:00 - So you just got diagnosed a year ago, so tell us your backstory?

05:51 - What rituals have you put into play for yourself to be able to get through the boring stuff?

07:00 - Do you get a dopamine release after having completed a list, or boring stuff?

07:38 - Who happens when you have to quickly adjust course? How do you balance your dopamine producers at all hours of the day and night, as various types of work demands?

10:30 - How do you handle negative criticism, and keep performing at one hundred percent even on tough news days?

12:32 - What have you had to fight through with respect to your being a Millennial, and a Female in a often-times patronizing industry?

14:23 - Americans are learning more about Premier League Football thanks to Ted Lasso. Who’s your team?

14:40 - How can people find more about you? 

Web:  https://abbiemccarthy.co.uk

Socials: @AbbieAbbieMac everywhere:  Twitter  INSTA  TikTok  FB

This was great- thank you Abbie!!

Guys, as always thanks so much for subscribing! Faster Than Normal is for YOU! We want to know what you’d like to hear! Do you have a cool friend with a great story? We’d love to learn about, and from them. I'm www.petershankman.com and you can reach out anytime via email at peter@shankman.com or @petershankman on all of the socials. You can also find us at @FasterNormal on all of the socials. It really helps when you drop us a review on iTunes and of course, subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t already! As you know, the more reviews we get, the more people we can reach. Help us to show the world that ADHD is a gift, not a curse! 

16:00 - Faster Than Normal Podcast info & credits.

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TRANSCRIPT via Descript and then corrected.. somewhat:

[00:00:40] Peter: Yo, everyone! Welcome to Faster Than Normal, another episode. Thrilled to have you as always. We got someone fun today to talk about- Abbie McCarthy is joining us from the OK. She's an award-winning TV and radio presenter and DJ. Okay, you'll find her hosting BBC music, introducing intent on the airwaves every Saturday night, and also bringing great new music and fun interviews to your TV screen on 4 Music and Eve four extra with fresh this month. She brings the party with her DJ sets. She has played a whole host of festival. She's played Glastonbury, Latitude & Knebworth, as well as playing several arena shows and she's serious. Like, no joke. She doesn't, she doesn't fuck around. You're gonna, you're gonna like this one. She's the hosting curator of popular Gig Night. Good Karma Club. God, what else has she done? Uh, she was nominated, she was inducted into the role of honor at Music Week's, women in Music Awards 2018. She's been highlighted by the radio academy as one of the brightest young stars in radio, recently featured and their esteemed 30 under 30 lists and winning silvers for best music presenter at the Arias 2020 I. Being in PR week, magazines 30 under 30, and I'm now 50. So yeah, now I'm all pissed off. It's gonna be a shitty interview. All right. Anyway, Abby, welcome. I feel old. How are you?!

[00:02:03] Abbie: Oh, I'm good, thank you. How are you? Thank you so much for having me. 

[00:02:05] Peter: I'm thrilled to have you. So you came to us because you, you were reading Faster Than Normal, the book, and you identified with it, and you found yourself in it.

[00:02:13] Abbie: Absolutely. I really loved it. I just loved the whole concept of it. The fact that you kind of said our our brains are like Lamborghinis. They just work faster than everybody else. But if you do the right things, you can use it quite efficiently. I thought it was a really nice way to approach it. Cause I think there's some books that you read and it's about kind of, Dismissing that you have A D H D or kind of not embracing it. But I thought that the whole approach was great and yeah, I took so much from it. And because I've only recently been diagnosed, it was such a useful book to lose myself in. I actually managed to read it in a couple of days and obviously everyone listened to this that has a D H D knows that's not always, that's not always easy. So I think it, uh, became my hyper focus for a couple of days. I really enjoyed it. 

[00:02:56] Peter: Very true. We don't, we don't normally finish things like that. Um, now tell us, so, so you just got diagnosed a year ago, so tell us your backstory. Tell us about what it was like growing up before you were diagnosed. What was it like as a kid? Did you, what was school like for you? Things like that.

[00:03:10] Abbie: I think I'm one of those classic people where, I was, I was, I was okay at school. I got like fairly good grades and I was always being told off for talking too much, which obviously makes a lot of sense now and I think that would happen more and more in the classes of things that I wasn't particularly interested in. Uh, you know, you mentioned at the start, I do lots of different things within music and, and some within sport as well. So I'm, I'm a creative person, so some of the more academic subjects I didn't particularly like, but I. Was Okay and, and got good grades, um, which maybe was why it wasn't picked up, I guess, when I was a teenager. Uh, but I, it's, I have this thing where I guess I. I just always felt like I was different, but I couldn't quite put my finger on why. And you know, even as I've got older and I've got to do some great things in my professional life, like being on the radio to me is my dream job. I still can't believe I get to do that. I get to go on the airwaves, pick amazing music, and connect with people and share it with them, but that's awesome. You know, it's, it's. It's, you know, you might look at me and be like, oh, she's getting to do her dream job. But then it's like, it's more like all the things I struggle with at home, I guess. It's like, you know, keeping on top of errands and, and things like that and organizing other aspects of, of my life. And I think that's the thing with A D H D, isn't it? Someone on the surface might look a certain way, but you never know what's. Going on in, in somebody's head. Do you, you know, my brain is racing constantly. Yeah. Um, but you know, I've, I've managed to, to hold down a job and I guess I'm lucky because it's , it's, it is in things that I'm interested in, so that makes it easier too. 

[00:04:50] Peter: Well, that's, I mean, that's really the key. You know, we, we all have to realize, you know, there are people who, who don't have faster than normal brains who can just sort of wake up, go to their job every day, do it for 40 years, retire, get their little gold watch, you know, and, and whether they love the job or not, is irrelevant to them. I. It's a means to an end. It's a way to make money. If we don't love what we're doing, we're not doing it well. 

[00:05:10] Abbie: Yeah. Or you just don't wanna do it full stop. Exactly. So I feel so blessed to be doing something that I absolutely love and I. I'm so excited to go into work every day and the, you know, what I do is really varied as well, which I think works with our brains too. Like, I'm not gonna get bored. Each week can be very, very different. Sometimes I'm in the studio doing a radio show, then it's something like festival season where I'm kind of here, there and everywhere DJing. It might be going to interview somebody, you know, on the other side of the country. It might be going to a gig somewhere else. So it, it's, yeah, it's, it keeps it interesting. It's, it keeps it lively. 

[00:05:43] Peter: Tell me about, um, so let's talk about the stuff you're not that great at. Let's talk about like, you know, what is it like to, you know, running the errands, things like that. What kind of, um, sort of rituals have you put into play for yourself to be able to get through the, the, the, the boring stuff?

[00:05:57] Abbie: I actually got this piece of advice from somebody on social media when I first posted that I'd got a diagnosis and they were saying the things that you don't enjoy, things like housework and errands and food shopping. It's almost like, think of it in a different way, sort of set yourself, um, a bit of a competition or like, so you're trying to do it in the quickest amount of time or, you know, you set yourself a reward once you've finished it, things like that. So then actually that those, those activities aren't just draining. You are in some way getting a little bit of dopamine and I think it's just like picking the right time in the day to do some of this stuff as well. I think now I try and get up, exercise is a big one for me and I know it's for, for you as well from, from reading your book, getting up, going to the gym, even if I don't feel like it, which I don't a lot of the time, I always feel so much better afterwards than kind of getting all of those errands and boring things out of the way and then I can just enjoy the rest of my day and I kind of don't feel the guilt that I haven't done all the, all the adult things I guess that I think I should have. 

[00:07:02] Peter: Well, it's interesting because that there is a, there are some studies that say that getting the boring stuff and stuff that you don't love getting it done is actually a dopamine release. Um, once they're all, not from doing them per se, but from that feeling you get of, oh, I don't have to do them anymore because I did them. 

[00:07:17] Abbie: Yeah, that's true. Yeah. You actually completed something that you set out to do, so that's gonna give you a buzz, isn't it? 

[00:07:22] Peter: Talk about, uh, some times where it's not that easy. Have things happened, whether you are in, uh, you know, whether you're at work or whatever? How do you deal with the things that, you know, you're, you're going a million miles an hour, right? When you're, when you're DJing or when you're working whatever, you're going a million miles an hour. What happens when you have to adjust course, uh, suddenly when you suddenly, you know, find yourself going off track or something like that. How do you keep yourself going, especially in a high energy job like that, because there's really only so much dopamine mean you can give. Uh, to get through over the course of a day, right. At some point, you know, I know that, that if I time it right, I give a keynote, I get done with the keynote, I get into the airport, get back onto the plane, and that's when I pass out. Right. So, how are you sometimes you're doing, I, I, especially as a DJ you're doing late, late nights, right? You know, into, into the wee hours in the morning. How are you holding that up? How are you keeping yourself aligned? 

[00:08:14] Abbie: I think when I am DJing or I'm, yeah, playing a big event, I get so in the zone. I get so pumped for it. So I kind of have enough energy to, to get through it. I think the thing that I struggle with the most is when I've had, you know, a really great run of work, so something like festival season or because I work in football, you know, the, the Premier League season that we have over here. I've just been getting to work on loads of games with that. When that stops and there's just naturally a tiny little lull in work, and I say a lull, it's like four days or something, and. Get really down cuz I'm like, I dunno what to do with all of this energy that I've got. I almost dunno how to, to harness it. And then I have a real low and I'm kind of waiting for the buzz and the high again of, of doing all the things that I love. And I think that's been a learning experience for me is when I have these days off. Which I really crave when I'm in the thick of it. You know, when you are like working back to back and you're traveling everywhere, you can't wait for a day where you are. You can just not think about work and relax. But when it gets to those days, I find it really hard to actually lean into them. So that's something I need to work on to be honest. Um, but the other thing that I think is a bit of a struggle in the job that I do, and maybe you'll relate to this or other people will relate to this. Do more of a kind of public facing job is, you know, the sensitivity we can have to rejection and criticism. It's very much part of my job, you know, it'll be like, I'll be presenting something or I'll send off a show reel sometimes I'm super lucky and I get the job. Sometimes I don't. That's just part of the business, but I might then be really upset about that for a little while, and I think sometimes. The emotional deregulation thing. I can f I can feel a little bit. So that can be hard. I guess if you are, you're in the fields and you're not feeling so great and then you've gotta, you know, go on air and give people a good show, give people a good time. But sometimes I imagine that's a savior because you kind of have to put on this. I thought, great, let's have a good time. And you're doing it for other people. You're doing it for that feeling. It'll give somebody else. And the connection that you have with you and your listeners is really special. So you kind of wanna keep that. So sometimes in a way it can get you out of your funk, which I think is good. 

[00:10:30] Peter: That's actually a really interesting point because I imagine that, you know, especially as a creative right, you do these amazing DJ sets, you, you're, you know, on the radio, whatever, and then yeah. You know, millions of people might love it, but there's one person who posted comments somewhere that's negative and that's all we think about, right? The same thing happens to me in keynotes. Mm-hmm. , but it's a real, you, you, you gave us a really interesting point, the concept of going on stage and having to put on that smile regardless of whether you're feeling it or not. You know, you don't have a choice, right? Mm-hmm. . So I would think that, yeah, in a lot of ways that's probably very, very helpful because you know that which you believe you eventually achieve, so, right? So, so you, you put that happy face on, you give that speech or you, you do that set at the end of it, you're gonna have that dopamine regardless. So it's a nice sort of, a nice sort of, uh, I guess, cheat sheet to get out of it. 

[00:11:20] Abbie: Yeah, it actually is. Yeah, cuz it kind of gets you into that mental space, even if you really weren't feeling it beforehand. It might be, you know, you've got some really bad news an hour before I'm gonna go on the radio, but then as soon as I'm on the radio, I'm there to. I'm there to give it everything and to hopefully, um, bring people great music but also, you know, some good stories and, and keep them company as well. So it can be very useful cuz it can definitely switch you into a more positive place. And like you say, access that dopamine that we are always searching for.

[00:11:51] Peter: Tell us about, um, how, first of all, how old are you, if you don't mind telling us. 

[00:11:54] Abbie: I'm, uh, I'm 32, so I got diagnosed when I was say 31. 

[00:11:58] Peter: You're 32 and you're female, and you're in an industry that's predominantly male focused and male driven. Right? So you are coming in as sort of a, I guess, uh, what are you, A millennial, I guess. Are you a millennial or Gen Y? What are you? 

[00:12:10] Abbie: Yeah, I'll be, I'm a millennial. I wish I was a Gen Z yeah. 

[00:12:12] Peter: You're in the cusp of a millennial, right? You're coming as cusp millennial. Tell us about some of the fights you've dealt with and some of the battles you've fought coming in as a millennial, a neurotypical, a neuro atypical millennial, um, who's a female in this male dominated industry. Right. You've, I'm, I'm sure you've, you've had to step up several times, both in, in football as well as DJ ing, 

[00:12:32] Abbie: Yeah, I feel like I feel it the most as a DJ actually to be honest, where you'll turn up to DJ at a festival and a club and predominantly a lot of people working in that industry, it is changing, which is great to see. But a lot of people working in that industry, uh, are male. And sometimes you can get a few patronizing kind of sound engineers who are like, oh, do you know how to use the equipment? Do you need any help with that? And you're like, yeah, that's why I'm here. I'm here to, I'm here to dj. I'm here to do the thing that you booked me for. Or the, or, you know, the, the place book before. So I feel like you can experience a bit of that and I think a lot of stuff like where, you know, you are doing as good a job as your male counterparts, but you're probably not getting paid the same. But I think so much is changing. There's a real positive shift in like entertainment, in music, in sport. To, to even things out. But I do, um, some stuff for, uh, for B B C sport and uh, a sport. Chelsea, sorry if you don't, or sorry if people listening don't. So I do some of their matchday live programming as well, and I, I sometimes feel most vulnerable being like a woman in sport. Cause I think often people are just looking to just dismiss what you say because that industry is still so, so male dominated. That one's probably got the most catching up to do. Um, so dealing with that sometimes, but then it's, I think sometimes you just have to, although we find it hard, it's like shut out the outside noise and, and thoughts and just have real confidence and belief in what you are doing and what you are saying. That's the only thing you can do. 

[00:14:10] Peter: Shut out the outside thoughts. I love that. So I've actually been a, I've been a Premier League fan for, for years, and I can tell you over the past few years here in America, I'd say millions more people have suddenly learned about non-American football thanks to Ted Lasso. So I think that, um, people are definitely learning a bit more , um, about it. What is your, who's your, who's your team? 

[00:14:31] Abbie: Uh, Chelsea. Chelsea Football Club. Yeah, I've been a fan since I was like six or seven. So the good times and the bad times, and the Inbetweens . 

[00:14:40] Peter: Very cool. I love this, Abbie! This has been so much fun. How can people find you? 

[00:14:44] Abbie: Uh, people can find me on socials, uh, a Abbie Abbie Mac. That's my handle on everything. So A B B I E. Um, yeah, come and say hello! You know what? Us people with A D H D are like we, we love to connect. So yeah, please do, uh, get involved. Gimme a follow and uh, shout me in the dms and thank you so much again, Peter. It's been so fun. 

[00:15:04] Peter: Oh, I'm so glad to have you! Guys listen to her stuff. She really is amazing, Abbie it's pretty incredible. Abbie McCarthy, thank you so much for taking the time. 

Guys. By the time this comes out, you will probably. Have already heard the news that, uh, Faster Than Normal is being turned into a kid's book. It is. I can give you a title now. It's called The Boy With the Faster Brain, and it is my first attempt at writing a children's book and I am so excited. So I will have links, uh, on where to purchase and how to purchase and how to get fun stuff like that and how to have me come in and, and talk to your schools and your kids and, and whatever soon enough. So stick to that. As always, if you know anyone that we should be interviewing, shoot us a note. Just people as cool as Abbie and all and above only. Those are the only ones we want. No, I'm kidding. Anyone, anyone you think has a great story, we would love to highlight them on the podcast. My name is Peter Shankman. I'm at Peter Shankman on all the socials. We're at Faster normal as well, and we will see you next week. Thank you for listening and keep remembering you are gifted, not broken. We'll see you soon!
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Credits: You've been listening to the Faster Than Normal podcast. We're available on iTunes, Stitcher and Google play and of course at www.FasterThanNormal.com I'm your host, Peter Shankman and you can find me at shankman.com and @petershankman on all of the socials. If you like what you've heard, why not head over to your favorite podcast platform of choice and leave us a review, come more people who leave positive reviews, the more the podcast has shown, and the more people we can help understand that ADHD is a gift, not a curse. Opening and closing themes were composed and produced by Steven Byrom who also produces this podcast, and the opening introduction was recorded by Bernie Wagenblast. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next week!