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Faster Than Normal - The ADHD Podcast

Having ADD or ADHD is a gift, not a curse. Hear from people all around the globe, from every walk of life, in every profession, from Rock Stars to CEOs, from Teachers to Politicians, who have learned how to unlock the gifts of their ADD and ADHD diagnosis, and use it to their personal and professional advantage, to build businesses, become millionaires, or simply better their lives.
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Now displaying: November, 2020
Nov 25, 2020

Stefan Georgi is considered one of the top direct response copywriters in the world and his words have grossed over $700MM via 50+ direct response marketing pieces. This includes numerous direct response pieces that are actively grossing over $10MM a month for both Stefan and his clients. A serial entrepreneur with multiple multimillion dollar companies under his belt, Stefan mentors numerous entrepreneurs and freelancers and through his copywriting programs, Copy Accelerator and RMBC, and his call center business, Turtle Peak. Today we’re talking about how he uses his ADHD and hyper focus to his benefit, every day. Enjoy! 

 

***CORONA VIRUS EDITION***

 

In this episode Peter & Stefan Georgi discuss:

1:52-  Intro and welcome Stefan! 

2:45-  So.. how goes the parenting while working form home going during this pandemic?

4:00-  On the deep zone of focus/work zone- how do you get back into it when interrupted?

5:00-  The daily routine

7:58-  On freedom through discipline 

9:18-  What do you suggest when it comes to staying active and staying at it, in this environment?

10:20-  ADHD in the winter and being diagnosed for a second time 

12:38-  What are some even more basic things you can do that help, say, if you don’t have a pool, etc?

13:34-  How are you thriving in this environment and how are you preventing distraction(s)? Ref:  Pomodoro Technique 

 

 

16:06-  How can people find you?  Via his website: www.stefanpaulgeorgi.com and @StefanPaulGeorgi on Facebook  @StefanGeorgi on Twitter  INSTA  Medium and LinkedIN

17:00-  Thank you Stefan! And thank YOU for subscribing, reviewing and listening. Your reviews are working! Even if you’ve reviewed us before, would you please write even a short one for this episode? Each review that you post helps to ensure that word will continue to spread, and that we will all be able to reach & help more people! You can always reach me via peter@shankman.com or @petershankman on all of the socials. You can also find us at @FasterThanNormal on all of the socials.

STAY HEALTHY - STAY SAFE - PLEASE WEAR YOUR MASK.. until next time!

17:33-  Faster Than Normal Podcast info & credits

As always, leave us a comment below and please drop us a review on iTunes and of course, subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t already! As you know, the more reviews we get, the more people we can reach. Help us to show the world that ADHD is a gift, not a curse! Do you know of anyone you think should be on the FTN podcast? Shoot us a note, we’d love to hear!

 

TRANSCRIPT: 

Hey guys, Peter, Shankman welcome to another episode of Faster Than Normal. Thrilled that you're here. As I always am hope you're doing well in this glorious actually kind of rainy looking out the window. It's going to pour pretty soon, but you know what? Hey, still better than the alternative. So glad to have you here, guys. I want to introduce you to Stefan. I am going to screw it up. He just told me five seconds ago, how to pronounce his name and I already forgot. Say say your name- Georgi. I was, I was close guys. Welcome to Stefan. Welcome to step under dry. He is without a doubt. Pretty impressive. He's a father who has ADHD, right. He faces his own battles being, working dad during quarantine, but it's pretty impressive what he's managed to do, you know, I mean, look, we've all, we've all gotten screwed over the past eight months, right? I mean, I remember when this y'all a couple of weeks, hang out my daughter, yay it will be fun. And it quickly turned into- imagined Morgan Freeman saying; but in fact, it was not fun and it became sort of eight months of, of, of nonstop, constant. everything, right? I can, I was multiple interviews interrupted, dad, how do I get onto zoom or whatever the case would be. And it's, it's been, it's been a struggle, but you know what? We figured it out. And an entrepreneur and CEO is fun. He's a father who has ADHD. He's faced his own battles, being a working dad during quarantine. So he's even talked to us about sort of how he managed to navigate this time. And more importantly, what you can do to do the same. So welcome to the podcast. Good to have you, man. 

Yeah, thank you. It's really great to be here.

So you sent me a bunch of stuff about, uh, what's things. I mean, I should mention also that, you know, in your, in your other life, when you're not being a dad dealing with all this, you're one of the top direct response copywriters in the world. And the words you put on paper grossed, it was $700 million. Um, by a 50 direct response marketing pieces. How are you from me? Um, you've done God. I mean, numerous response because they're actually actively grossing over 10 million a month for both you and your clients. You got several multimillion dollar companies under your belt. You're a serial entrepreneur like I am, uh, pretty impressive. And you have a call center business, have a copy accelerators, not bad, man. So, but let's get back to what we're talking about. None of that matters, right? When you're dealing with, uh, uh, for me a seven year old kid, who's you know, who can't figure out why. Why her laptops off and like, well, cause remember I told you to plug it in and you didn't, that would be why, you know, all that stuff, everything I've done on TV, nothing really matters. What matters is the kid can turn on a laptop. Right. So you've been in that mode. 

Yeah, I haven't, yeah, my daughter's two and a half. And, um, so it's interesting cause she doesn't fully understand, you know, what's going on with the lockdown and, and it's kind of like a blessing in a way, uh, to be able to spend so much time at home and to see her so often. But, uh, you know, the whole, like daddy's working thing is, um, can only go so far. She, she actually. Yeah, bless her heart is now she's getting closer to three. She'll kind of go, you know, daddy's working and give me a big hug and a kiss. And, um, Kind of walk away, but, but even, you know, today I was trying to do kind of deep focused work writing copy for a client. And she keeps coming to the doors of my office and coming in and then wanting to like, look at pictures and like, you know, I love her more than anything else in this world. So like, I'm, you know, I want her to do that, but, uh, you know, it can be disruptive when you're trying to put your attention into something and then your kids coming in kind of disrupting that and trying to take your attention regularly. So that can definitely be a challenge. 

Well, I mean, from an ADHD perspective, you do you get into the zone. You're in deep work zone. You're you're, you're crushing it. And then something pulls you out of that. Getting back into it's a bitch. 

Yeah, exactly. Um, it's, it's, it's tough. And especially I think happening like once is bad enough, but when it happens sometimes like, you know, three or four times over a half, an hour or 45 minute period, it's it gets very frustrating as, as I'm sure you're, you know, you're very much aware as well. So let's, let's start with that.

I mean, you're looking at, you know, this isn't going away, right? I mean, my kid is in her second day back in, in real school, there she's actually in classroom, but you know who the hell knows how long that's going to last. Right. So I'm predicting two weeks and they're back. So, you know, what do you do? Yeah, for me, some of the things that I've been stretching strategies up into kind of like employing one is I like I'm an early riser and I like to wake up early anyway. And so really embracing that and in the kind of the first couple of hours of the morning, I'll wake up at between five 30 and 6:30 AM. And then right now, at least my daughter. And my wife both don't really wake up until like around 8:00 AM and then they may be up with they're kind of laying around and, and my daughter is again, very lucky. She's a pretty good sleeper and we kind of had our sleep schedule early. So, you know, if I wake up at five 30, uh, I'll have a cup of coffee or in the morning right away. But, uh, kind of actually jumping right into the most important stuff that I have to do for the day. Like focusing on that, uh, like kind of deep work is the term I use. I didn't talk about that term, but, um, the book by the way, Yeah. Yeah. I think I count Newport. Um, but yeah, it is. It's true. So, so cause, cause when I've previously, I would still have that morning time, but it's like, I'd go on Facebook and you would talk about, um, like an add or ADHD, like Wonderland, uh, going on Facebook and these notifications and things are popping up and it's like, the stimulus is great, but I think it kind of overstimulates you, uh, so I've kind of made this thing where I don't go on Facebook until like noon or one, even though a lot of my business, stuff, things I do for business are on Facebook. Uh, but so kind of minimizing that as a distraction. But again, having that, that morning, uh, deep time or deep work time has been really valuable. So that's one kind of really actionable thing that I've personally been doing, uh, is to jump right into kind of the big tasks for the day, like right away when I wake up.

You know, it's funny. Um, the trait of early risers is, is very common to those who are, are like you. And I, I actually start my day on 4:00 AM. Um, and I get you, I get on the bike for an hour and I lift for an hour or whatever. And, you know, the, the difference in who I am, uh, between the times on the days that I do work out versus the days I don't. Palpable. And I don't even have a noticeable, like my daughter now has no daddy, did you get on your bike this morning? You know, they know, I know you're not as happy. You know, it's, it's, it's dopamine thing, you know, that, that whatever we do that morning sets the tone for the day. And if it's about giving us that extra dope, man, you know, it's an entirely different world.

Yeah, a hundred percent. And I do, um, I do like a morning walk almost every morning, which is about like three miles. Uh, and then like I'll lift once or twice a week too. But, um, but yeah, so th and that's for me, the, the sleep schedule is actually so important because like, even right now, I'm, I'm from San Diego. Originally, the Padres are in the playoffs and they won a play off series for the first time since 1998. Uh, and so the games are kind of like the, I think the game ended at like 10 45 last night. So I went to bed at 11 and I woke up. At like 6:45 today, which is, if you think it's not a huge difference and my day has been fine, but it just taking, eating into those couple of hours is actually a huge difference. 

I think one of the things about us is that it also lends itself to a negative, um, uh, chain of events. You know, you do it once. It's a lot easier to do it twice or three times or two weeks or four weeks. Next thing you know, it's a month later. I haven't exercised. You're, you're, you're severely lacking in dopamine or gain 10 pounds, you know, it's not just, it's not a good place to you. Can't let it start. 

Right. Yeah. So I've really embraced. Uh, but you know, like freedom through discipline type thing. I really try to be pretty disciplined and, um, you know, to the sugar of even my wife sometimes, cause it's like, well, why don't you want to stay out longer and do this? And, and, um, I'm the, I'm not trying to be like no fun. And I, I think I do have lots of fun, but yeah. I just know when I stay on a routine and a schedule, I'm just not only am I more effective, but I'm significantly happier. I'm just like, I'm like a better person to your point. Right? When I wake up at five or 5:15, and I do my morning walk and then I go work on whatever big project I have and I have that time to sort of like, uh, feel like I'm really in control of my day. It just makes a huge difference versus sleeping in until 6:45 or 7. And then I know my daughter's getting up in an hour and there's pressing things. It's just a totally different, um, like those couple of hours, like can, can make your day feel twice as long in a good way. Um, it's, it's amazing, right? It's like two hours, but it's like an exponential increase in the amount of time it feels like you have in each day. 

I mean, talk about, uh, let's, let's reach out to this staying active, right? So, you know, my gym has finally reopened. I mean, they basically moved the entire gym outside to a vacant lot and it's it's to be able to get there is great, but I spend my time in, in quarantine and lockdown, you know, on, on FaceTime with my, with my trainer and being able to, um, you know, to, uh, to 22 pound kettlebells. Right. And that's it. Um, what do you suggest when it comes to staying active and staying at it? It's obvious that, you know, you stand up every couple minutes every, every hour or so for a few minutes and it vastly changes how your brain works. Right. But when all of a sudden we're surrounded by, you know, our living room as opposed to an office, whatever. 

Yeah. I mean, we were. I'm lucky that for our house in Las Vegas has like a pool and we're on a golf course. So, um, even in the height of lockdown, I was still doing the walks every single day. Cause you were still allowed to go walk outside. Uh, then we were swimming like pretty much every single day. So I'd work until maybe four or 4:30 and then it was full-time time for an hour, hour and a half. Uh, and then for a while you could go off. So I was trying to get on golf and you couldn't anymore, but we could still go out onto the golf course and then it was closed down. And I don't know if we probably weren't supposed to, but we did. And then there was like, um, like Roadrunners and quail and the different animals. So, you know, going with my daughter and like looking at animals and watching her chase bunnies around, uh, things like that helped a lot. Um, and, and, you know, fortunately the lockdown is not as bad now. I generally find from myself personally, I dunno if you're the same way that, uh, in summer, uh, it’s.. inactivity is less of an issue or a worry but as you start getting to the fall onto the winter, that's where I've had more issues. So for example, when I most recently got kind of redialed, I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was like, I don't know, 10 and, and kind of was like on, off medication and then in my early twenties and that kind of like stopped, you know, forgot about it for a couple of years. And, um, then I, I w I thought, I thought I was having like seasonal affective disorder because in the winter I start getting kind of like depressed and mood swings and things like that. And I went to see like a really good kinda therapist and he kind of asked me, he's like, all right, well, like, you know, during the summer. What does your routine look like? You know, you, you stop working at four 30 or five, like, what are you doing? And I'm like, well, you know, maybe I'll play golf or get with my family and go get dinner or go see friends, or we'll swim or we'll do this. And he's like, all right, cool. And like in the winter, when it's four 30 or five, what do you do? And I'm like, well, it's already dark. So I just go home and I sit on the couch and I want to have like a drink and I start getting kind of depressed and he's like, okay. So like your activity level is basically cut in half. During, like the winter months when the days are shorter. Um, and I was like, yeah. And he's like, and by the way, have you been like, diagnosed with ADHD before? And like, Oh yeah, several times. He's like, yeah, basically you're not being at all active in the winter. And then like, you know, that that's stressing you out and, um, it manifesting in these ways. And so, uh, just as a coping mechanism, For, um, for myself and staying active during the winter months, uh, trying to go out more. I mean, I know like, as an entrepreneur, we're able to go out and eat dinner out a lot. Um, you know, it's not always, I mean, we try to eat pretty healthy, but, but even like, like I know it can be kind of costly, but for us it's something where it's like, it's being able to leave the house and go out and do that activity or whatever um, really helps, but if you can't do that, you can do like a night walk or depending on the climate, but I'm pre-lockdown go see a movie, whatever it is, but really trying to be extra out. I have to kind of force myself to be extra active, uh, during the kind of the late fall and into the winter, but it makes a huge difference. And as soon as I started doing that, like the kind of mood swings and seasonal depression stuff went from like, get like an eight or a nine on the scale to like a two or three, it was a huge, huge difference. 

Yeah, no question about it. Um, what do you suggest? I mean, even like basic stuff, you know, for not, everyone's lucky enough to live in Vegas now pool. Um, I had to pull.. and I was all like, I've got a pool and of course they shut it down. And has it been, uh, what else can we do? How else, how else do we get through? 

I mean, even stuff like getting up, you know, getting up every, every, every hour is walking around your apartment. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's a huge one. I mean, I think physical movement, uh, it changing your environment even in like an apartment, right. If you can. Work in your bedroom, some of the time and work in the kitchen, some of the time and work in like your, you know, family room area, like stuff, area. I think even just changing your, your, even within the same, like an apartment, like changing the place where you are, things like that, I think can make a big difference cause, um, at least for me, uh, the same environment over time can kind of make me grow bored. So, um, so even just little things like that, like changing up your environment, um, and where you're working from, or that can be really valuable too. 

How do you, uh, how are you working in this environment and how are you preventing distraction?

Um, yeah, it's a great question. And it's funny because that this house in Vegas, which I love my office has like, um, like a glass door. So it's completely see-through and it's right by the front door of the house. So like whenever somebody comes in, um, you know, like I see it. And then for my daughter, she comes up. It's not like she comes in and even knocks on the door, it’s like, she literally just sees me as she walks by, um, So, you know, the, but the biggest thing for me is one of the communication, like with my wife, I mean, she kind of, she knows like when I'm working and when I'm doing deep work to kind of not, uh, I don't wanna say bother me cause it's never bothersome cause she's my wife and I love her, but, um, to kind of leave me be in that I'll take breaks and I'll come out and I'll find her. And then. If we need to catch up on anything, we can do it at that point. Um, you know, the other thing would be like with my daughter, just like having her doing different activities, having her, so she's not sitting around bored and trying to just go to the office all the time and ask what, you know, what's dad doing, um, and then I use like noise canceling headphones. You know, I, I use, um, those Bose noise-cancelling headphones I've been doing that for years, uh, before I kind of realized that it was ADHD related. Cause I, I would, I always thought I was crazy, but I'd be like, you know, man, if I could just work in like a vacuum chamber, with no sound. I'm like, that would be my perfect environment. Like some people like to listen to music and they do and stuff like that. I want just as quiet as possible. Um, so I don't have extra like stimulus kind of like assaulting me. Um, so going something like that wearing noise canceling headphones can be good. And then one of the things I've been really working on and, and using is a technique called Pomodoros, which I'm not sure if you're familiar with that or not 50 on 10 off or yeah. [The Pomodoro Technique] Yeah. I do like 25 on five off and, um, and then just while I'm doing that, like really minimizing things. Like, I don't keep email up. I don't have any like, like I never do desktop notifications, like out of like, we use Slack for some of my businesses and they're constantly trying to get you to enable desktop notifications. 

Noope. Never, never, never. 

It's like, that is just my nightmare. Um, so you know, the Pomodoros are nice. So if the 25 minutes on five minutes off, cause it's like, normally. I can get 25 minutes, right. Normally. And so it's a, more of like a micro-commitment than being like, I need to spend the next two or three hours, uh, without any distractions. Um, speaking of that, my daughter is now actually up here calling for me, but, um, yeah, 

Well it's okay. It's been about almost 20 minutes, so we'll wrap it up anyway, wants to make sure you get back to your daughter, but, um, tell us about how, how can people find you?

Yeah, I think if you want to go to my, um, my website, which is, uh, www.StefanPaulGeorgi.com. Uh, if you want to get my email list it's you can just go StefanPaulGeorgi.com/subscribe I do like a daily email, um, as part of my routine that, um, is like me talking about entrepreneurship, um, copywriting, freelancing. And then even a lot of personal stuff too with my family, or I've talked about my ADHD and it was just cool because it turns out a lot of entrepreneurs have it. 

Right. Totally, I write about that stuff all the time. 

Yeah, exactly. And so people have found that it's been rewarding for me to share that. And then more people. Uh, you know, kind of reach out with their own stories as well. So yeah, if you'll get my email list, it's not, I don't sell you that much stuff often. It's more of just kind of like me building relationships with people. Um, but I’m happy to share that stuff. 

So we'd love for anyone who wants to join it. It's like it's like sharing a brain with someone's hysterical. You say the exact same things. I said, it's very funny. Awesome guys. Thank you so much for taking the time to join un on Faster Than Normal. I truly appreciate it. I know, I know how busy your schedule is. I give the floor to your daughter, you have to go hang up, hang up with me on and deal with, but thank you so much. 

Yeah, man. It's my pleasure. Thank you so much for having me. 

Awesome guys. You listened as always best to normal. Like what you hear?? Drop a review. Leave us a note. Shoot me a note. Uh, you got any good people you thinking should be on? Leave me a note as well. We've got a huge list of people who we're we're slowly filtering through, but we're always looking for more! :-) We'll see you next week. ADHD is a gift, not a curse. Neuro-diversity is a gift, not a curse. Stay happy, stay safe. Wear the mask! Talk to you guys soon.

Credits: You've been listening to the Faster Than Normal podcast. We're available on iTunes, Stitcher and Google play and of course at www.FasterThanNormal.com I'm your host, Peter Shankman and you can find me at petershankman.com and @petershankman on all of the socials. If you like what you've heard, why not head over to your favorite podcast platform of choice and leave us a review, come more people who leave positive reviews, the more the podcast has shown, and the more people we can help understand that ADHD is a gift, not a curse. Opening and closing themes were performed by Steven Byrom and the opening introduction was recorded by Bernie Wagenblast. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next week. 

Nov 18, 2020

As an artist (Island Def Jam) and a songwriter (Sony/ATV) herself, Andrews is sensitive to the challenges that both up and coming and seasoned singers and writers face in music today, and she carries that knowledge with her in her work as a consultant for industry veteran Barry Weiss’ RECORDS label, as well as in her joint venture with Weiss, publishing company Twentyseven Music at Sony/ATV. The Calgary native has collaborated with some of the most renowned names in the market today, including heavy hitters such as Drake, Jennifer Lopez, Little Mix, Tori Kelly, Jessie J and Benee, as well as producers Noah 40 Shebib, Diplo, DJ Mustard, Max Martin, Illangelo and Stargate. Most recently, she has taken pop singer-songwriter Noah Cyrus under her wing, A&Ring her single “July” and writing the remix featuring Leon Bridges, which has garnered more than 160 million streams to date. She is also celebrating the stellar success of the hit she co-wrote with New Zealand-born singer/songwriter Benee, “Supalonely,” which has produced over 10 million TikTok videos and has massed over 125 million streams on Spotify alone. Today we’re talking about her passion and work towards the premise of mental health for Creative Professionals. Enjoy! 

[Read more about our guest today HERE]

 

***CORONA VIRUS EDITION***

 

In this episode Peter & The Jenna Andrews discuss:

1:10-  Intro and welcome Jenna!  Ref: Aliza Licht’s podcast Leave Your Mark

3:30-  So what prompted you to make mental health a passion? Ref: Emily Ratajkowski article in Harpers Bazzar  

6:28:  Talk about what resources there are or more importantly, what resources there should be for artists/songwriters for anyone trying to pursue a career in The Music Industry. Ref: Jenna’s new podcast The Green Room. Ref:  The Jed Foundation 

9:20-  Ref #SameHere started by my Eric Kussin (Hear Peter’s interview with Eric here

10:00-  On working to removing stigma, stereotypes, being honest, open and just not judging!

12:48-  What are you doing personally to take care of yourself? What are your sort of life rules that you put into place?

14:10-  Tell me how you reacted when you found out that your song “Tumblin Down” was going to be featured on Grey’s Anatomy?  Ref:  Imposter Syndrome

15:50-  And you were first discovered on MySpace??

17:30-  A couple of lightning round questions. Where's your happy place? Where do you go when you just want to be happy? What place is the happiest, the most creative, most confident?

20:00-  Since you've kinda got the RomCom thing going on then answer this: Awesome or Creepy: “Love Actually

21:30-  What is your most unhealthy favorite food?

22:40-  Ok, last question; what’s your favorite type of work out, if you work out?

23:23-  How can people find you? Where can people find you? Via her website: www.TheJennaAndrews.com and @TheJennaAndrews on Twitter  INSTA  Facebook  YouTube and  on Spotify Her podcast is The Green Room

23:40-  Thank you Jenna! And thank YOU for subscribing, reviewing and listening. Your reviews are working! Even if you’ve reviewed us before, would you please write even a short one for this episode? Each review that you post helps to ensure that word will continue to spread, and that we will all be able to reach & help more people! You can always reach me via peter@shankman.com or @petershankman on all of the socials. You can also find us at @FasterThanNormal on all of the socials.

STAY HEALTHY - STAY SAFE - PLEASE WEAR YOUR MASK.. until next time!

24:10-  Faster Than Normal Podcast info & credits

As always, leave us a comment below and please drop us a review on iTunes and of course, subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t already! As you know, the more reviews we get, the more people we can reach. Help us to show the world that ADHD is a gift, not a curse! Do you know of anyone you think should be on the FTN podcast? Shoot us a note, we’d love to hear!

We have a new sister video cast called 20MinutesInLockdown! A video podcast devoted to learning fascinating lessons from interesting humans all around the world, all in 20 minutes or less!  20 Minutes in Lockdown was born in early April of 2020, when we were in fact, in lockdown, and couldn’t do much of anything. Realizing that more than ever, people could benefit from learning from people outside of their comfort zone – people with interesting stories to tell, people with good advice, people with useful ideas that could help improve lives, we started hosting short Facebook video interviews, and we grew from there. (Plus, you can actually see my hair colors change before your very eyes!) Check it out:  www.20MinutesInLockdown.com

 

TRANSCRIPT: 

Hey guys, Peter, Shankman welcome to another episode of Faster Than Normal. Thrilled that you're here. It is a gray, disgusting day here in New York city, but we are hopeful. Um, even though we are looking at a 3% rise in coronavirus, because most of you mother won't wear a mask and it's pissing me off, but whatever, it's still great to have you all here. I am glad you are here. I'm glad you're I hope you're all healthy and safe and that wearing your mask. Okay. We're talking to someone today. I I've talked to her now for about three minutes before I started. And I'm already in love. This person is awesome. I love everything about this person. Let me tell you she's so Jenna Andrews. Okay. If you are in the music industry, chances are, you've heard of this one. As artists with Island Def jam and a songwriter with Sony ATV. She sent him to the challenges of both up and coming as well as seasoned singers and writers and what they face in music today. She carries that knowledge with her as a consultant for industry veteran, Barry Weiss, his record label, as well as her joint venture with Weiss, a publishing company called 27 music and Sony ATV. Okay. She's worked with Drake, Jennifer Lopez, little mix, Tori Kelly, Jessie, J Benny producers, Noah 40, Diplo, DJ mustard. Max Martin. I am not cool enough doing half these people are, but I, I know that she's worked with Noah Cyrus, um, uh, eight and her single July and writing the remix featuring Leon bridges, which has garnered over 200 million streams to date. I always hesitate to put streams or numbers in my bio because I have to update them like every week, 210 million, 20 million. Anyway, I was actually going to say that I'm sure it's in there. Tell your publicist, update the stream. Okay. Anyway, she is very, very passionate about, about mental health and mental health for creative professionals, songwriters musicians. And that's why she's here today. I heard her on my wonderfully good friend Aliza Licht’s podcast and Leave Your Mark, which if you haven't subscribed to that one, I strongly recommend that Lisa is the shit and I am thrilled that Jenna has taken the time to be here to gentle. Welcome. Thank you so much for being on Faster Than Normal.

Oh, of course. Oh my God. By the way, your intro is pretty spectacular. I was like, wow, this is awesome. You're really good at you're really good at that. I'm like, I'm like, yes, I am. I'm here for it. When people introduced me I'm always looking around like, who the hell are they talking about? It's really, but that's cool. Literally. 

I love it. So how tell us about, so I want to focus most of the mental health, cause you know, we only facet normal is only 20 minutes, 30 minute interviews cause you know, 80 days. But um, I want to focus on the premise of mental health, you know, Whether you're an entrepreneur or you're a musician or any kind of creative or whatever you're doing in life. We tend to push mental health to the side. We still tend to push it to the back burner. We don't think about it as something, you know, we'll go to the gym right, five times a week and we'll do this dumb ass juice, detox, cleanses, whatever. But the one thing that we don't focus on anywhere near as much as we should, as society is taking care of our brain. And so what prompted you to make mental health a passion? 

Um, it was funny because when, when you were, we were actually talking three minutes before, um, we started and you mentioned, um, your story and, and obviously how having ADHD, you know, back, you know, I guess what was it like 15, 20 years ago? It was totally something that wasn't, um, kind of okay to admit. So I actually have a similar experience because I, I feel like throughout high school people always were telling me, Oh yeah, she has a learning disability, dah, dah, dah, like all this kind of stuff. And I was so embarrassed about it. And, um, you know, at the time I didn't want to see anybody and it's it's um, yeah, it was like, it was shameful, which is so, which is so weird. I mean, that's one of the reasons, another reason is, you know, I was pretty badly bullied in high school as well. And, um, I went through an eating disorder and you know, I think a lot of young girls can relate and unfortunately way too many girls go through it. So it really made me feel one, you know, being a musician, it's been a way that I've been able to purge my emotions and feel better in a cathartic way, so I feel like in combination with that, and also just, you know, being able to be open through song. I was like, well, we do this every day in a song writing room. Like, why can't we open this up to the world for whoever's comfortable to talk about it, especially for the fans out there, you know, listening to these musicians or idolizing people that probably are going through similar things that they are, you know. 

It makes a lot of sense what you say. You know, the interesting thing though, is that again, it's not necessarily something that tends to be focused on. Um, long-term, you know, I remember, uh, a lot of my friends I was telling you before, and then I went to LaGuardia, high school, Performing Arts, and a lot of the kids who I went to school with a good handful of them, you know, they started out their musical careers and they were working on it and they were, you know, sort of, um, pushing forward and pushing forward. And it was a constant grind that constant struggle and a constant, you know, series of rejections and being told no, and being told to lose weight or gain weight, or dye your hair or change this, or change that and get a boob job, whatever it was. And this was in the nineties. I, I, by the way, I I'm, I'm madly in love with you about the fact that you said it must be 15 to 20 years ago, that was in high school. It's closer to 30, 35 years ago, but bless your heart. Anyway, I appreciate that. Um, but you know, the, the, the, the concept of all of these rejections and all of these sort of, you're not good enough, or you'll be better if you do this. Right. takes its toll. There was an article written by, um, uh, Emily Ratajkowski, the, the, the model. Um, I don't know if you read it. It was in, I think it was in New Yorker. It was in Harpers. I don't remember where it was published last month or so where she talked about what she went through as a woman and as a model and how she was basically just treated like a product and, and, and she could never, she was never get everything she did, you know, was fixed this change that do this and. Talk about, um, in the music industry, talk about, you know, sort of what resources there are or more importantly, what resources there should be. Um, for artists forcing us we're songwriters for, for anyone trying to pursue that career. Who's constantly told no. I mean, we're told to just, you know, I'll just keep pushing forward. Same thing and sales, I guess, in the business, keep trying and keep going, keep going, but they never talk about sort of what people can do to, to fix themselves and to get the help they need. 

Yeah. I'm actually in the process of trying to figure that out actually in, in doing this whole thing. I mean, really it's so it's so interesting because you know, starting.. I’ve started, uh, my own podcast called The Green Room about mental health. And obviously, you know, that, um, I, you know, in doing that, I think it was, it started as like, you know, an idea of being able to, you know, just be able to purge as I said, but then it really built into something that's, that's become just what you just asked is like, you know, being able to support people in the industry and outside as well. But like, I guess I'm working on that now. In fact, I spoke to, um, I spoke to somebody yesterday about potentially coming up with, you know, essentially making things like making some sort of program up or, you know, he writes policies. He was talking about ways that we can sort of come together and find ways that we can actually provide um, ways that people can or places people can go. Cause right now, you know, honestly, just speaking from the music community, it's like obviously writing songs is something that's therapeutic, right? That is, that is why people do that song is the feel better, right. In terms of actually solving some problems, like one thing I spoke to about my, to my friend or this, you know, this therapist yesterday is he basically was saying that he's trying to find a policy to like make, you know, have it be that people don't necessarily have to go to prison when they're, you know, abusing alcohol or drugs, because, you know, there has, there's such a deep rooted problem, like reason for that, for that. So it should be something should be there to help them rather than like, sort of punish them for it because it's really based on mental health. And a lot of times in music and entertainment, people really get. Um, get like a bad rap because a lot of times it will be like, Oh yeah, musicians are druggies or alcoholics or whatever, but it's really just because it's like, we're depressed in the same way everybody else is, it’s just that you're putting it out for the world to see. Right. So. Like going back again to your original question. That's I don't, I don't know that I have like the solution right at this very moment, but I guess what I'm hoping to do through The Green Room is to be able to, you know, talk about it. And obviously I partnered with The Jed Foundation, which is, um, a nonprofit for mental health. So we're giving all of that money back to the mental health, all the donations go back to mental health, which is the first step. Um, And yeah, and I guess there's just, you know, obviously, you know, providing hotlines and things for people to call, but I do think that there has to be a bigger. Being in that. So I feel like this is something it's a work in progress. 

There's a, a nonprofit called #SameHere started by my friend Eric Kussin and the whole premise there is, is just to sort of, to legitimize the conversation around mental health. I think that if we, you know, if the conversation around mental health to legitimize, it would, it would solve, you know, we're not gonna solve all the problems, but that's a great start, right. Getting people to open up and talk about it and know that, you know, One of the reasons that I, I, I look at my ADHD and I know that it's a benefit. And, and the reason I do this podcast is so other people can learn that and not be stigmatized for it. 

You know what, that's actually a really, exactly what you just said is a hundred percent what I am hoping to do through what I'm trying to promote in doing The Green Room and also just making mental health, such a, um, I guess an okay thing to talk about it with, within the music community, because I think. By coming out and saying, Hey, listen, I had an eating disorder and, and saying, Hey, listen, I was bullied in high school. Hey, I drink too much. Or just stuff like that where it's like, Hey, listen, not everybody can admit that. Right. But I feel like when you can, it helps you get through it because you're like, okay, you you're going through it, so you're not alone. And I think that's really. That's like the mantra is like, people don't want to feel alone. 

One of the things that I've noticed in my, in my spare time was I'm a licensed skydiver. I jumped out of airplanes for fun and yeah. Okay. Uh, we call it, FEMURing in, bring in, when someone lands has a hard landing, 90% of time, they land on their femur and they break their femur. Right. Which is essentially breaking their leg. It hurts like hell and, um, you know, they get titanium putting in, they get like rods in my leg or whatever, I think. There's actually, they're actually t-shirts that people sell that says, you know, I'm 90% metal or titanium or whatever we immortalize and embrace the concept. Oh yeah. I broke my leg. Look at how strong I am, you know, but we don't do that for mental health, you know? And, and I think that's really, what has to change is the premise that I'm not saying we need to go around and say, yes, I'm an alcoholic, but, but not to be. Um, not to be judged. That's not to look at it as a sign of weakness. Right. We break our leg. We don't look at someone with a broken leg. Hi, you fucked up. Look at you. Ha you broke it. You know, why do we still have that same stigma around mental health? And I think that is what a lot of you know, is sort of starting to sort of gain traction and become a movement where it's not stigmatized. 

A hundred percent. And by the way, you're so right about that. It's like people are allowed to make mistakes and it's not to say that you should say alcoholism is the way to live. It's not, it's not promoting that. And that's only one example of many different types of things. But I guess that I found that interesting in, in, in my conversation yesterday, because I was like, okay, yeah. I mean, that is a serious stigma, but you have to realize what, what, what, it's, what extend that, you know what I mean? Like why does that person have the addiction that they have. And, and, and I think that, um, the important thing is exactly what you said as well is just not judging somebody. And I think, um, you know, for example, I'll give you another example. A couple of weeks ago, I did a show, um, I talk with Teagan and Sarah and we talk about obviously, you know, you know, the gay community and coming out and what that looks like? And there's so much judgment in that too. Like even a lot of what they talked about is, you know, the stigma of like, Hey, if you know, even in the gay and lesbian community, it's like, if you don't look like you're gay and even the let's be in community, judge, you. You know what I mean? It's like, how crazy is that? I mean, I'm just thinking there's, it's such a, a broad, um, subject, I think for judgment all across the board on a lot of different levels. 

What are you doing personally to take care of yourself? What are your sort of life rules that you put into place?

 Um, exactly this, I really find the most healing thing for me is the talk about it and I think, um, therapy of course. Um, but I find that it's beyond just going to a normal therapy session. I find that just talking about it with friends or, you know, Instead of repressing feelings, just putting it out there. I find that as much as open as I am, the better I feel. Do you know what I mean? Cause if I'm going through something, I feel that if I, what I learned over my life is that when I. When I sort of like pretended it didn't exist or like, you know, just kind of like put it, put it away for now. I was always way more depressed. And I think that talking about it is just so healing for me. So I'm constantly trying to talk and challenge myself to get better, I guess. Um, yeah. 

Okay. Let's uh, let's move, move to a fun topic um, as well, we'll come back. We'll circle, we'll circle back to this at the end, but I, I gotta ask you a couple of questions and, you know, forgive me for this. Um, tell me how I'm hoping for a great story here. Tell me what happened or how you found out and how you reacted when you discovered, when you found out- when, I guess when your agent, whoever called you and said, Hey, “Tumblin Down” is going to be on Gray’s Anatomy?

Oh, well, it's so funny. I, I, that was, um, like that was so many years ago now. Yeah, actually it might've been like 2000. Yeah. Something like that. 2011. Um, you know, I mean, obviously I thought it was really exciting. Um, but it's, it's. You know, as an artist, this is another thing to say is like your, your, so you have this like, That nothing's ever good enough. 

Oh my God. Imposter syndrome. There we go. I was at imposter syndrome shows up in every single episode, every single guest talks about it. So congratulations for continuing for continuing the streak. We're good. We're I think we're 202 for 202. 

Haha! Awesome! I’m glad. Okay. This is good. I mean, we're, we're, we're artists out here, you know? Um, but it's a good sign. It means that you really, you know, I think the best artists and no ones that, you know, have the most pain and have. You know, I have something to say in a story to share, to share with people, um, all feel these ways, because I think that it's impossible to be satisfied and make good art, you know, think about it. It's like if you, if you fall into a place that's complacent, you feel like you've arrived, then there's like, like you don't want to, how could you still want to create? You know, so I guess that. That's how it feels. It's just like, okay, cool. That's good. What's the next thing. And it's not even like, not being grateful.

Right? Of course it's grateful, but it's just like, it's just the nature of the beast. 

Yeah. Now, if, if I'm, if I remember correctly, you were discovered, and this is, this is gonna, you know, as someone who grew up in the eighties with the era and the era of dial up modems in America, online, this continues to blow my mind, you were discovered on MySpace weren't you. 

Yes. And I it's so funny now because my face is, so it's such a dinosaur now, too. So it's like, it's so odd to think about because really my space was the first social network, I guess that really started this whole trend. Right. So, but no, I was exactly that. So I just kind of, I put up a song, um, For my parents basically than I, so I had moved out of my house, um, right from high school and, um, I, you know, didn't have any money and I really just wanted, had a lot of pride that I wanted to show that I could do it on my own and all these things. So I really wanted that. I like didn't have that to get back to where I was living, which was like, you know, an hour outside of the city. So I slept in my car by the beach and I wrote this song for my parents, um, being, obviously couldn't buy them a Christmas gift. And, um, and then I ended up just being like, Hey, cool, it's an acoustic song. Like I really like it. Let's just throw it on MySpace. And that was it. And I've learned now through my career as those things that happened the one, the times that you really just think. Absolutely not the times that you're just like, you know, if you're going in, you know, 350 days of the year being like I'm working today, I'm going to write a hit, I’m going to do this, or I'm going to do that. The other, you know, 10 days are the days that you'll actually accomplish something that you're not thinking about anything. It's like, those are always the times that you actually achieve the best things is when you're doing it for an authentic reason beyond any sort of specific like superficial goal. From my experience.

Couple of questions, uh, sort of, sort of, um, uh, lightning round questions. Where's your happy place? Where do you go when you just want to be happy? What, what place the happiest, the most creative, the most, uh, uh, carefree and confident. 

Well, okay. There's two that you just asked what makes me the happiest and what makes me the most creative are definitely two different things right now. Oh my God. You're gonna, you're gonna, literally, I don't, I'm scared to say this, but as a person that just says I have to be vulnerable and say everything, I feel I have to do it, but I freaking love the stupidest romcoms, like Hallmark movies. They make me. Like this time of the year literally makes me so happy. You guys don't understand. Like, I actually like have an obsession with Hallmark movies. Like I, like, after the day writing, I like look forward to being like, Oh my God, the Hallmark channel. And I'm like so excited. Um, and, but you're asking me during these, this December months, so this is definitely my happy times, right?

Yeah. Okay. And what about most creative? 

Most creative is. Um, like it's, it's either being like inspired looking out the window right now. It's like either being inspired by like, you know, what, something around you like where it's like, I can't even define it necessarily. It's like, it's, I feel like I get the most creative when I'm either like, so inspired by a thought or a melody or just something visual, I guess I'm a really visual person too. So I feel like, um, that really captivates me. So I need to feel like I, if I, if I all of a sudden see something or hear something, like if you said something right now, Like often the best songs are like, you could say it and I'm like, Oh my God, it's the best content I've ever heard. And that's so inspiring to me, you know, I was just like in conversation, having like the song, just write itself, and that's what a song is. 

So to follow up on the first point of your Hallmark movies, I saw a, um, an Instagram ad, I was at a certain Instagram and the other day that showed a person wearing socks. And the socks on the soles of the socks said, “if you can read this don't bother me cause I'm watching Hallmark movies”. So I'll have to get you up to get you a pair. 

OMG, Yeah. I'm actually dying right now. You have to! I will send you a pair. Yes. I'll get your address from your, from your, uh, from your publicist. 

Okay, so here's the same question. Since you've got the romcom thing going on, then answer this’  Awesome or Creepy: “Love Actually”. 

Awesome!

Thank you! Thank you! There's a, there's a growing movement that says it's creepy and like stalkery and all that I'm like, come on. It's Love Actually. 

Oh my gosh. How many times have you watched that movie? Hundreds. Hundreds. Okay. Actually I'm like, I'm like, shit. I bought that movie is iconic. It's wonderful.

What's creepy is the little boy chasing the girl. I mean, that's like, no, that's awesome. I think the creepy part is the guy stocking the, his best friend's wife. No, it's not, the science is like that, that scene where it's like, Oh, I get goosebumps thinking about it. 

I, I remember I, my, my ex wife, I'm still very good friends with, we were watching the movie and I was listening to the song. Um, Anywhere You Go, right? [[“Wherever You Will Go” by The Calling]] Anyway, you follow you. And, um, uh, No, no. Wherever you may go wherever you, um, the one that's playing in the bar when he goes to America and he meets the girls. Right. And I'm listening to it. I love it. So it's a great running song. And she says to me, my, my ex says to me, one day, she goes: ‘You just like that song because he ends up having a threesome’

That is such a, like, I, I, yeah, I could see that. I could see her saying that, but that's not why come on! That song. 

That's not entirely why. Okay. Couple more, couple more questions. Um, favorite, uh, or worst, I should say, um, most unhealthy favorite food. 

Ooh, what was that healthy, favorite food? I rarely eat healthy. Like, I don't even know if I, um, Oh, I don't even like that, like bad food. Like that's the truth. I mean, I'm actually being serious. Like, I mean, my cheat is like tomato, basil rice cakes, which I'm like obsessed with. And I know I sound insane. I know, but like, I'm not like a pizza, French fry, like person. I don't even know that that would be like my choice.

I’m really glad that I live in the other end of the country because just knowing that we'd never ever date- oh my God. I don't like pizza? What the hell is wrong with you?! Rice cakes are, are literally an affront to God. Okay. Whatever, they're an affront to God. 

Can I just say I do like pizza, but interesting, but I, but I just feel like. It's not like my go-to. Okay, fine. I put, I'll put cheese on a tomato basil rice cake and you're when we, when we, when we hang out, you're going to have it and it's going to change your life because it's so good. 

Only if I can I take you- I'll take you to Claudio's pizzeria on 10th and 43rd street. Oh, okay. Deal? Deal.

Last question. Tell us, do you tell us about what you work out? Do you work out? What's your favorite one? 

Pilates. I love Pilates. That's an easy one. Yeah. It's just like, it's so. Um, I feel like one it's like so refreshing to do right in the morning. Cause it's like, it's like, obviously you get all like stretching and you can like get all your muscles working. But it's also like a lot of like core strength, especially when you do it without, um, the reformer, like, cause we've been doing Pilates like this whole. You're just with, um, an instructor on zoom, which has been awesome. And it's like, you know, like I don't have a reformer, so it's just a lot of core strength, like weights and it's just like, you're kind of like working everything and it just, I love it. I just think it checks all the boxes for me. 

Where can people find you? Via her website: www.TheJennaAndrews.com and @TheJennaAndrews on Twitter  INSTA  Facebook  YouTube and  on Spotify Her podcast is The Green Room

Jenna Andrews. It's everywhere. You know, all my socials are the same, so that's when they can find me. And I'm behind the screen on behind the green wall.

Well, I was gonna say behind the, is the rest of your life, right? Don't take it down. And that's where the that's where the wizard hangs out. Jenna Andrews, thank you so much for being on Faster Than Normal. I truly appreciate your time. This was, this was phenomenal. I hope to have you back. 

Of course, thank you so much for having me! 

Guys, thanks for listening as always, if you like what you hear drops review, uh, stay safe, stay healthy. It is crazy out there and it looks like it's only gonna get worse. So until it gets better, I'm reminding you to wear the mask. Please wear the mask and we, if you don't do it for yourself, if you don't care for yourself, do it for someone you love and you should love yourself anyway, because we're the only ones we got. We'll talk to you guys next week on another episode of Faster Than Normal. Thank you so much for listening. Take care of yourselves.

Credits: You've been listening to the Faster Than Normal podcast. We're available on iTunes, Stitcher and Google play and of course at www.FasterThanNormal.com I'm your host, Peter Shankman and you can find me at petershankman.com and @petershankman on all of the socials. If you like what you've heard, why not head over to your favorite podcast platform of choice and leave us a review, come more people who leave positive reviews, the more the podcast has shown, and the more people we can help understand that ADHD is a gift, not a curse. Opening and closing themes were performed by Steven Byrom and the opening introduction was recorded by Bernie Wagenblast. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next week. 

Nov 4, 2020

Dennis Berry is a Certified Life Coach and has been working with people worldwide for over 15 years. With modern technology, he can work with anybody anywhere via Zoom. His expertise is in Addiction Recovery, Alcoholism, and Life Mastery. He has firsthand experience, having been sober since April 8, 2003. With his journey in sobriety and recovery from drug abuse, it helped him find his mission in life, which is to help others on their journey through sobriety and achieve inner peace and success in every area of their lives. Dennis knows what it is like to be helpless and hopeless with no positive direction. He was able to climb out of the gutter and transform his life and he spends his life helping others do the same. If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired and you are ready to make changes in your life, book your first FREE consultation today. You will see some light at the end of the tunnel.  Today we’re talking about how Dennis began his path to sobriety, which led him to coaching and how helping other’s remains his life’s calling. Enjoy!

 

***CORONA VIRUS EDITION***

 

In this episode Peter & Dennis Berry discuss:

1:10-  Intro and welcome Dennis!

1:40-  A first-timer’s trip to AA; highs and lows

2:40-  What started you on your path to sobriety; what was the beginning?

4:50-  What led you to giving back, then to become a coach?  Ref: Peter’s interview will soon air on Dennis Berry’s “The Funky Brain” podcast 

6:30-  Things will get better. Everything is always changing.

8:30-  What is the top thing people do to self-sabotage, and what can they do to break the cycle? No pressure ;)

10:00-  Rituals versus Resolutions + the healthy, subconscious mind

10:14-  How can people find you?  

Via his website at www.DennisBerry.com and on the socials:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dennisberry1/ 

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/LifeCoach.DennisBerry

Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/dennisberry_ 

YouTube: http://youtube.com/DennisBerryfunkyBrain

10:39-  Thank you Dennis! And thank YOU for subscribing, reviewing and listening. Your reviews are working! Even if you’ve reviewed us before, would you please write even a short one for this episode? Each review that you post helps to ensure that word will continue to spread, and that we will all be able to reach & help more people! You can always reach me via peter@shankman.com or @petershankman on all of the socials. You can also find us at @FasterThanNormal on all of the socials.

STAY HEALTHY - STAY SAFE - PLEASE WEAR YOUR MASK.. until next time!

12:04-  Faster Than Normal Podcast info & credits

As always, leave us a comment below and please drop us a review on iTunes and of course, subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t already! As you know, the more reviews we get, the more people we can reach. Help us to show the world that ADHD is a gift, not a curse! Do you know of anyone you think should be on the FTN podcast? Shoot us a note, we’d love to hear!

We have a new sister video cast called 20MinutesInLockdown! A video podcast devoted to learning fascinating lessons from interesting humans all around the world, all in 20 minutes or less!  20 Minutes in Lockdown was born in early April of 2020, when we were in fact, in lockdown, and couldn’t do much of anything. Realizing that more than ever, people could benefit from learning from people outside of their comfort zone – people with interesting stories to tell, people with good advice, people with useful ideas that could help improve lives, we started hosting short Facebook video interviews, and we grew from there. (Plus, you can actually see my hair colors change before your very eyes!) Check it out:  www.20MinutesInLockdown.com

 

TRANSCRIPT: 

Hey guys, Peter, Shankman welcome to another episode of Faster Than Normal. It is great to have you as always. I got to change up what I say. I say the same thing every time I start a podcast again. Anyway, let's talk addiction today. Let's talk addiction. Let's talk some real hard grit, some real hard facts. You know, ADHD is a hair's breath from addiction. All neurodiversity really isn't. It's just these little tiny. Can't even see them. They're so small changes in the brain that take us down many, many paths, and we're going to talk to someone who's not only been down that path, but has come back and it helps other people get past that and back from that path. Dennis Berry certified life coach, he's worked with people over 15 years. He works in addiction, recovery, alcoholism, and life mastery. He's been sober since April 8th, 2003, which is freaking amazing. His journey for sobriety and recovery from drug abuse, helping find his mission in life, which is to help others journey through sobriety and achieve inner peace and success in every area of their lives. Dennis. Welcome. 

Thank you, Peter. It's so nice to talk with you again, as lot of talking with you, you're a wealth of knowledge and I liked the pace at which you move. 

Thank you. Yeah. You know, so one of the things I noticed when I decided to sort of get a handle on my ADHD and why I was drinking so much and things like that. I went to a AA a few times, right. In the very beginning. And, um, you know, we're all introducing ourselves just saying, hi, my name is whatever. And I remember a guy next to me, told a story and it was very brief, but it ended with, and I quote, um, fifth time getting arrested for sucking dick in Tompkins Square Park for crack. And then it was my turn to tell my story and it went something like I kind of had a hangover the other day, you know, and I didn't feel like I belonged and it wasn't that way for a while. And then someone one day introduced me to the concept of high bottoms versus low bottoms. Right. Which is the premise that you don't have to be in Tompkins Square Park doing exactly that, to decide that you've had enough. So why did you, when did you decide you had enough? Obviously, I believe 2003; what started it for you? What was the end result? 

Well, you know, my mind was leading up, mine was a bunch of horror stories. I did not end up sucking deck in the park. I did, uh, I do have some horror stories. Mine were like car accidents and being stupid and saying stupid things and getting in trouble. But that wasn't one of them. However, you know, it's interesting point that you bring up high bottom, low bottom. I was in a meeting. I used to go to a lot of AA myself early on, not as much anymore, but there was a woman there who was the speaker and she was there because, and I can tell you all my horror stories that went on for 15 years and they were crazy and bad and wild and like insane. Like you see in a movie, hers was, she was sober like 15 years because she drank two shooters of vodka every day. And to me, that was silly because I was like, that's like breakfast. That didn't make sense to me, but to her, it was a problem. So she had to make changes. I don't remember the circumstance. Maybe she likes me back their kid, after she had tutors or something that hurt her, it made her think I have a problem and I need to make changes for me. Mine went a lot deeper. I was bankrupt financially, spiritually my body, my mind, my relationships all broken. So I finally became willing to listen to somebody else and change the way that I was living. And, uh it's and it's been a long road. You know, one of the things I, that I talk about all the time and that I instill in my clients is like, you know, the drinking, the drugs, the food, the porn, the shopping, whatever your problem is, it’s not always the problem. It's what I'm using to cope with the real problem, which is my thinking. And so when I can work on that and, you know, clear up the past, see where all these. These issues originated from and work on those, then I can become more focused and, uh, you know, turn my life around for good. And, you know, it's when you get to that moment that you realized what it was all for, and while you're doing it.

Tell me about what prompted you from going from where you were to not only recovery, but then becoming a coach too, to teach other people, why the give back? 

Well, and that's, I love that question. I, I was helping people anyway. And I love it. It feeds my soul. And I think a lot of people, like, I know you're passionate about everything you do. Um, you were on my show and we talked about that and there's a lot of people and by a lot, I mean, most people, whatever the percentages are, do not do things that feed their soul. And they're the ones that they lay in bed in the morning with the sheets over their head, scared to get out of bed because they don't want to go do that job or whatever it is that they're doing, pay the bills, you know, pay for the kids or whatever it is. And I was helping people anyway. And I w I get fulfilled that way. Now along the way, in the last 17 years I've started businesses. Most of them failed, but some of them worked out really quite well. And I was able to change my health and I, and I've been able to live a life that most people dream about. And a lot of it was because I was pursuing my goal, my, my dreams. And, uh, every morning when I get up, I have clients that look to me for help, which at first I was like, they must be really screwed up if they're asking me for help, you know? But, um, at the end of the day, I'm just truly blessed, lucky, fortunate, whatever you want to call it to realize years ago that my path was to help other people that are struggling from anything to not have to struggle at the depth that I did, you know? 

I heard a great quote. Once it said that that people were broken or people have been down that road and struggled before, want to help people because they know what it's like to have been that hurt. And they never want to see anyone go through that again. 

Yeah, that's right. I know how painful it was. And I think that that's one of the reasons that I go and love talking to kids in schools and universities and things like that and you know, it's that.. ‘yeah, I've been there and it sucks ass, but it's, it's going to get better. 

It is. 

Yeah. And you know, when you're in that hopeless state of mind, when you're sitting isolating and your house or apartment or wherever you're living, and you think that the world, like the current state that you're in, it's always going to be that way. And it's not. 

And the tough times, never last, neither do the good times. Everything changes all the time. And it's, if you can figure that out on your own, that's great. But a lot of people, you know, need help, they need somebody to say it, you know what…I love that there was a cartoon where it shows a guy on standing on top of this big hole and there's a guy down in the hole and he's raising his hand out. And this guy on the bottom of the hole, he says, I don't know how I got in this hole. I'm going to be stuck here forever. I can't get out of this hole. And the guy up top, he's like here, give me your hand. I was in that hole last week. I'm going to help you get out. 

I heard it on the West Wing. It's a, the guys in the hall and, and the, and a priest walks by and he says, father, can you help me? And he throws down a couple of prayers. And then, uh, you know, a businessman walked by and said, can you help me get out of this hole? And he throws down some money. And then his best friend walks by. He says, Mike, can you, can you help me? And Mike jumps down in, he says, ‘nNow you idiot, we're both stuck in this hole!” Yeah, but I’ve been here before. I know the way out.’  I love that. It's so true. You know what I've found so many times that I can find inspiration from people who I watch a TV or movies, whatever, and the sure enough, lo and behold, I do my research and yeah. And they're in recovery. It's it's hysterical.

So let's talk, um, give me some, some, some, some help here that I could pass along. Um, top three things that. People do to self-sabotage and, or just give me a top, top one thing that people do to self sabotage and how they can break the cycle. Wow. That's like being on the, you know, not, not that I'm putting you on the spot or anything. 

No shit. Yeah. Well, One of the things that I tend to notice a lot is being unfocused or not feeling like they're worthy, that not feeling that they're worthy is one big thing. Um, but the unfocused thing I would say is trying to do too many things at once. And I say, uh, you know, I just did a webinar on this about a half an hour ago actually. But, um, you know, we all try to focus on too many, doing so many things and we really need to focus on just doing one thing. It's called the one thing. And when I'm focusing on the one thing, which for you, I think. I don't know how it works. I think you might be one of those people that I could focus on 20 different things. 

Yeah. That's not easy. 

Right. But I think it's so important. Some people are like, you know, they'll try to work on five things and then they get overwhelmed and then they quit and they end up drinking or eating or doing something to distract themselves from working on the one thing and getting to achieve their goals and their dreams. That's a, that's like the biggest thing that I noticed with all my clients and we spend a lot of time getting focused on that. 

One thing. I heard a quote once that said, and I've, I've, I've stolen at music, uh, liberally over the past years. Um, Resolutions fail rituals succeed. But if you can get yourself to do something over and over again, for a certain amount of time, it becomes a ritual and rituals tend to have a much higher success rate than, uh, than, uh, resolutions.

So that's how we reprogram our subconscious mind. Our subconscious minds were programmed. Over a period of time by doing the same thing over and over and over whether it was healthy or unhealthy. That's how our stuff conscious mind. There. Some things that are so conscious minds do that are healthy, like brushing our teeth. So we had to learn mechanically and mentally how to do that from a very young age. And we did it over and over and over again. You don't even think about it. We just pick up our toothbrush before we go to sleep. The moment we wake up and we brush our teeth, but we also get programmed to live in fear and we don't even realize that. And it happened by- it could have started at four years old when we got scared of something and we carry that into our lives every single day, over and over and over again for an extended period of time. So to change that we need to go back in and find the root cause of that, and then shatter that behavior over and over and over and over again, day after day for an extended period of time.

Awesome. Uh, great answer. Um, how can people find you? How can they get more info about you? 

Uh, well, everything my book, the podcasts, uh, uh, and schedule appointments and stuff that you can pretty much the best place is to go through the website, which is www.DennisBerry.com. And you can schedule appointments right on the site, or you can reach out and contact me and we'll have a schedule, a free consultation for a little while and talk and see if you don't feel better.

Dennis. Thank you so much for taking the time today. I really, really appreciate it. Um, you know, good stuff and I'm definitely gonna have you back at some point next few months. Thank you, 

Peter. I appreciate it, man. Have a great day. 

Thanks for listening. Definitely guys, as always you’re listening to Faster Than Normal. If you liked what you heard, leave us a review. We'll be back next week with a new guest, keeping it brief this week, but brief is good when you have ADHD or any form of neurodiversity. Stay happy, stay healthy, wear the mask, stay safe. We'll talk to you soon.

Credits: You've been listening to the Faster Than Normal podcast. We're available on iTunes, Stitcher and Google play and of course at www.FasterThanNormal.com I'm your host, Peter Shankman and you can find me at petershankman.com and @petershankman on all of the socials. If you like what you've heard, why not head over to your favorite podcast platform of choice and leave us a review, come more people who leave positive reviews, the more the podcast has shown, and the more people we can help understand that ADHD is a gift, not a curse. Opening and closing themes were performed by Steven Byrom and the opening introduction was recorded by Bernie Wagenblast. Thank you so much for listening. We'll see you next week. 

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